Shivering Heart
by Fifitheflowertot
Summary: Suffering is all she's ever known and she isn't willing to let anyone get close to her. What happens when a certain bluenette becomes a major part of her life? Kai x OC. Might change to M later (First two chapters a little slow, just pull through!) DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

_Bring Bring_

Her hand abruptly struck the infuriating device which flew across the room smashing into pieces of now useless metal and plastic. _Damn alarm, what kind of a masochistic person would invent something like this? _She sat up and glanced around the room. There were half opened boxes scattered around with a few garments splayed across them. The room itself was average sized; there was a desk in the corner with a laptop and a few books placed neatly placed upon it. The rest of the room was pretty much empty. The wallpaper had peeled off in some placed and there were a few cobwebs in the corner. Overall, it was a fairly cozy room; just needed a bit of a clean.

The teenage girl unwillingly removed the duvet from her cold, shivering body and forced herself to stand up. There was somewhere that she needed to be today, but she had no idea where. Having no brain power this early in the morning she returned to her welcoming bed and stared at the ceiling. _I wonder what Ash and Kazuma are doing. Maybe I should ring them just to say hi, but what if they are busy? Or they don't want to talk to me, having finally gotten rid of me. _She angrily shook her head at these poisonous thoughts and picked up her phone. Just as she was about to press 'call', a young man's face appeared on her screen.

'Hey Fifi, how's America? You settled in yet? Meet anyone yet? Any new friends? _Boy_friends maybe?' a masculine voice enquired.

She rolled her eyes and smirked to herself. 'I only got here yesterday; you want me to befriend the whole town in a matter of hours? And who in their right mind would go out with someone they had literally just met? Jeez Ash, sometimes I wonder how you get through life.'

'That hurt, Fifi, more than you will ever know…know…know…know' His voice quietens at the end.

She snorts, 'You weirdo Ash. You think that sounds sexy or something, pfft'.

'What are you talking about? I always sound sexy; by the way, Kaz wanted me to tell you something…'

'What?'

'… I forgot… … PLEASE FORGIVE ME YOUR HIGHNESS! I WILL PUNISH MYSELF FOR THIS UNFORGIVABLE MISTAKE! Oh wait! I remember! He said, (clears throat) don't forget to take your meds and have a good first day at school.'

'…'

'Hello…? Anyone alive? Woohoo! Fifi?'

'SCHOOL! I knew I forgot something! Shit I am so late! Got to go Ash, say hi to Kaz for me. And yes don't worry, I will take my meds, promise'.

'Alright, any problems you know who to call'.

'Yes, yes, call either you, Kaz or the doc'.

'No, I meant you can call the Ghostbusters, I'm sure they'll be happy to help with any problems you have'.

'Urgh, bye Ash, talk to you later'.

'Hehe, I love annoying you, bye'.

She grinned to herself grateful that there were at least two people in the world who cared about her. The two brothers had looked after her when she needed them the most, they were her foundation but now she needed to try and survive without them. She sighed, _that is going to be an almost impossible task. No Felicity, think positive – sunshine, rainbows and all that crap. Oh crap! School!_

She flung her phone which landed on the bed and sprinted towards the bathroom where she proceeded to brush her teeth and face with lightning speed. Running out of the bathroom, her eyes raked over the clothes she had bothered to unpack before picking out her 'don't bother, I'm not drunk yet' T-shirt. _Always a crowd pleaser. _She matched it with a pair of skinny jeans, biker boots and her favourite leather jacket.

_Oh God, I have 15 minutes to get to school in time, not good for the first day._

She stood in front of the mirror, bright green eyes taking in her appearance. There are different types of good-looking; there are girls who are cute and girls who are just plain hot. She fell into the second category. Her curvy body and sharp eyes attracted the attention of the worst kind of males; the overconfident, egotistical type who only wanted her for her looks. _I wish I could swap looks for happiness. _She glared at herself and sighed, feeling unmotivated. Her flawless skin looked paler than usual, probably due to the busy day she had, moving into a new city can be taxing on a female's appearance. Her long black hair reached the bottom of her back and curled near the ends. She ran her long, elegant fingers through her dramatic side fringe, deciding that this was the best she could do at such short notice.

She slid into the kitchen and grabbed a crisp packet from the cupboard. _Oh how proud Kaz would be, I'm being so healthy._ She rolled her eyes and grabbed her keys before remembering the most crucial part of her morning routine. Meds. She dashed into the bathroom again and swiped her medication from the cupboard. She placed two of the small white tablets onto her tongue and swallowed without water. Being so used to pills, she was a pro at taking them. Snagging her bag from the kitchen counter, she left the apartment and began a steady jog, accelerating to a sprint.

_Shit, shit, double shit! I have 8 minutes left!_

Her long legs began to move at an almost inhumane rate as she dashed towards school running past various people who shouted curses at her and rolled their eyes. She knew what they were thinking, _typical teenage hoodlum. Useless to society. Have no place here or anywhere for that matter. _She dismissed these recurring negative thoughts and continued tearing her way towards the wretched building.

_Five fucking minutes left!_

The school gates appeared in front of her, _more like the gates of hell, _she mused.

There were crowds of teenagers making their way towards their classrooms for form time, or homeroom as they called it in America. She hopped up the stairs and was lost in the wave of people. _Just go with the flow, ow my foot! Fuck the flow. _Pushing through the crowded corridor she saw a door with the title 'Principal' and 'Mrs McCarthy' on it. _Maybe I need to see her first. No-one ever explains anything to the new person. Sheesh._

She fought against the current of bodies and managed to latch onto the door frame without being carried away. Her smooth knuckles tapped the wood sharply and she waited patiently before hearing a quiet 'come in'.

The door swung open to reveal an office that was quite large but looked cramped due to an immense desk slap bang in the middle. There was an uncomfortable looking wooden chair in front of the desk which, as Felicity deduced, was most likely for the students. On the other side of the room was another chair however this one looked very cushy and soft. _Selfish bitch, thinks she can sit on such a comfortable chair while making kids sit on that horrible thing._ There was a large book shelf behind the luxurious chair filled with books about childcare and how to deal with 'temper tantrums'. _Jeez, does she think we're like eight or something?_

'Hello, what can I do for you? I don't think I've seen you around? Ah, you must be the new student. Welcome to Wilson High School. What is your name again? Golly gosh, I had your file just the other day? Give me a moment to find it'.

Felicity stood there staring at the middle aged woman who seemed to like the sound of her own voice far too much. Her hair was clipped back in the typical teacher style and her glasses were half way down her rather large, protruding nose.

'I'm Felicity Phoenix and I just moved here from London and'

She was cut off by the sound of the door slamming open and hitting the wall with a deafening bang. She turned to look at who caused the noise and was faced with a red faced teacher with his nostrils flaring gripping the arm of a boy with bright red hair. He was almost as tall as the teacher and she could tell he was well-built as the outline of his muscles could be seen through his rather tight t-shirt.

'I'm sure this is illegal. This is child abuse. You're ripping my arm out of my socket', the red head's voice was deep and Felicity could hear the hint of amusement running through it.

'Shut up, I've had enough of your behaviour', the teacher replied, obviously worn out from dealing with the boy.

'I've found it!' Mrs McCarthy lifted her head from the depths of her drawer and asked the Felicity to sit down. 'Now, Mr Rogers, what is the problem? If you haven't noticed I am busy with another student'.

'Well, Mr Valkov here decided it would be funny to draw a vulgar image of me on the blackboard and then blame it on 'pixies' who flew into the classroom at night and drew the horrid picture'.

'Hey man, I told you, it wasn't 'pixies'. It was 'elves'. Get it right at least.' The red head rolled his eyes. It was only then he noticed the raven haired female sitting in front of him. His ice blue eyes absorbed every inch of her curvy body before resting on her face. 'Woah, who are you sunshine? I don't think I've seen you here. I'm Tala Valkov and I would _love _to show you around. You know, you'd get the full tour of the place. But nothing comes free these days right?' He winked at her.

'I'd rather have sexual intercourse with a possum', she said in a dead pan voice. Her wide green eyed stared emptily towards him but being the flirt he was, it didn't discourage him.

'So you're into that kinda stuff huh? Kinky', he smirked, his eyes dancing with amusement.

'Alright enough Mr Valkov, detention for being disrespectful towards a teacher. Is that all Mr Rogers because I am rather busy, by the way, I should mention that Felicity will be joining your class from today.'

The red head's eyes gleamed and his mouth curved up into a smirk, 'hell yeah! I'll be seeing you later gorgeous'.

'Mr Valkov, please stop bothering the poor girl and be respectful to her in class', the male teacher sniped.

The green eyed girl rolled her eyes. _This guy is going to be a handful. Should be interesting._

The door closed leaving the two females sitting in the room. The older woman began babbling about the school rules, lessons, teachers and other things that weren't particularly interesting. Felicity's gaze wondered to the window where she saw the parking lot and many different cars. She began to memorize all of the number plates as a means to pass time. Her mind worked quickly in learning all of the numbers and letters and repeating them from memory, this was a soothing activity for the girl and she smiled a little at her accomplishment.

'Well, do you have any questions?'

Felicity's eyes snapped back to the woman's face, 'no, I think you covered everything'.

'Well okay dearie, if you need anything please come anytime and ask.' The woman smiled at her.

'Thank you', _leave me alone woman! _She stood up and quickly walked out of the suffocating office. _Thank God, that was the longest 45 minutes of my life. If the principal is like that I dread to think what the school will be like. Two years, just two years and I can go back home. _

The raven haired girl pulled her bag over her shoulder and began to walk towards her homeroom classroom wondering what the people in her class would be like.


	2. Chapter 2

**So I changed the story to first person, it was a little bit easier :P Do you guys like her by the way? Please review and tell me what you think, I really want to improve :D**

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 2**

'This year is very important and I'm sure that you all…'

I guess this is where I will spend the next two years, listening to this crap. Wonder what would happen if I ditched. Nah forget it, too much effort. Okay, so all I have to do is push the door open… just a little push. Damn, why am I so nervous? I've been to school before so what's wrong with me? Okay, ready, 1… 2…3… push… It's opening, IT'S OPENING!

I walked in, trying to seem confident and saw 30 students looking bored out of their minds. It was like they didn't have enough energy to keep their heads up. The teacher didn't even notice their disinterest or me walking in, he just continued running his mouth.

'Ahem', he finally turned round to look me and turned back towards the class and continued yammering away. Well if he wasn't going to say anything to me I might as well just sit down and join the mass of jaded corpses. There was only one seat free next to the window which is lucky; at least I have something to look at when he's droning on.

Suddenly, the orange head in front of me turned around, 'I'm Emily' and she turned back round again. I only got a glimpse of her, but she was quite pretty. Her large oval glasses framed her face well and her bright orange hair made her stand out quite a bit.

I turned my head to the right and saw another girl with mousy brown hair and large chocolate eyes which were framed by thick eyelashes. She noticed me looking and smiled, 'Hi I'm Hilary' she glanced at the teacher before turning back to me, 'this guy is so boring, he totally puts me to sleep. You know last year his speech went on for 40 minutes! 40 minutes of my amazing life wasted and you know what else'

'Miss Tachibana, if your conversation is so interesting would you like to share it with the class? I'm sure we would all like to know'.

'Erm… no it's okay, hehe' she gave a nervous giggle before hiding her scarlet cheeks.

I rolled my eyes at the man and glanced out of the window. There were two boys in the school parking lot weaving in and out of the cars. They seemed to be looking for something, one of the kept getting on his hands and knees to look underneath the vehicles while the other was just looking frustrated.

My mind started wandering to lunch and what the cafeteria would be like when I felt a sharp kick on my leg. I turned around furiously and saw a tall, muscular boy with deep crimson eyes and blue hair. He gave me an empty look before closing his eyes. I frowned, what was his problem? He didn't even say sorry. My glare was still fixed on him, just waiting for him to open his eyes. After 3 minutes of this I felt defeated and turned around. Che, so annoying, I can't believe he didn't even acknowledge me.

Without warning I felt two eyes burning holes in the back of my head. I wasn't going to turn around, nope… not going to turn around. I could feel the skin crawling on the back of my head.

'Does anyone have any questions?'

Finally he had finished. I felt the intense gaze move away and I sighed in relief. They should use him to torture people, much more efficient than waterboarding.

'Now, I would like to introduce a new student who has joined us from London. Felicity Phoenix, stand up please'.

The whole class turned to look at me as I slowly got up. There was a catcall from the back of the class which the teacher ignored as he turned around to clean the blackboard.

'Hey, it's you again. By the way, my offer still stands.' It was the redhead from the principal's office.

'Oooh, what offer? Knowing Valkov he'll want some of _this_ and _that_' a smug voice called from the seat next to the redhead, 'I want in on it'. He smirked at me to which I gave my coldest look and sat down. Stupid males think they can say whatever they want and degrade women. They piss me off so much, urgh.

The bell rang at that moment signalling the end of homeroom. According to my timetable, I had biology first in room 14. I grabbed my bag and began walking towards the door before colliding with a hard body and almost losing my balance.

'Watch where you're going bitch'.

It was the same guy who kicked my chair and burned two holes in the back of my head. I suddenly felt hot anger rising inside me. He began walking towards the door again before I yanked his arm back and forced him to look at me. His face looked slightly shocked; at least I was able to surprise him.

'What is your problem? Did I do something to offend you? Is it because I sat in the seat in front of you?' I could feel my face getting hotter, 'you didn't even say sorry when you kicked my chair and then you crash into me and call me a bitch. What, your mum never taught you how to interact with other people?' The words just kept spouting out of my mouth.

All of a sudden I felt a large hand covering my mouth and those deep crimson eyes staring into mine. It was like they could see my secrets and I suddenly felt like a child again; scared and alone. I was snapped out of this trance when he simply said, 'shut up' before sauntering out of the room.

My cheeks were flushed as I stared at the now empty doorway. There were a few students who witnessed the embarrassing event but didn't say anything.

Damn idiot, who does he think he is? I remembered his gaze and shivered involuntarily. I should stay away from him, anyone who invokes that kind of a reaction is not someone I need to be around.

Sighing, I went back to the task of finding room 14. The school was like a maze with the rooms numbered completely randomly. I walked down another corridor before finding myself face to face with the class flirt.

'Hey, bet you wish you took that tour now huh?' He smiled at me. 'What room are you in?'

'14', I muttered wishing I would have run into someone else.

'Alright then, let's go'

He started walking but stopped when he noticed I wasn't following.

'I'm not going to have sex with you so if you're helping me for that reason I suggest you find another girl to harass'.

His face was completely flat for second before splitting into a huge grin. 'I'm not that self-centred, if you need help I will help you. And you've made it very clear that you won't have sex with me'.

I raised an eyebrow and shrugged. Might as well accept his help, if he tries touching me I'll punch the living daylights out of him. 'Fine, let's go'.

…

Biology passed quickly. I sat next to the orange haired hair who barely said two words to me, which is how I like it to be honest.

The rest of the day went by in the same way; not much human interaction. I prefer computers anyway. Humans are way too complicated.

The bell rang signalling the end of school and I made my way across the parking lot. Such a long day, I can't believe I'm going to have to come here every single day, such a waste of time and effort.

I kept complaining under my breath and scowling at the pavement so I didn't notice a group of teens standing outside a diner right in front of my apartment. There were around five girls and a few more guys. I recognized Hilary, Emily and Tala among the teens; it looked like they were waiting for a ride and I didn't really want to converse with them however, we all know that the world hates me and decided that now was the best time for the alarm on my mobile to go off. The tone was a plain ring but that didn't stop a few of them from turning round, one of them being Hilary, the class chatterbox.

'OMG, hey Felicity! Like, why don't you hang with us for a while? Where are you going anyway? Maybe you could come to my house and we could do some fun stuff. You know, like girl stuff. That sounds so fun! Let's! And then afterwards we could go to that huge house party at Kai's…' The words gushed out of her mouth and wouldn't stop flowing so I did what any person would do.

'Sorry, but this is urgent.' I gave a polite smile to the brown haired girl before turning round. 'Hello Kazuma! Yes, I know, I will do that as soon as possible. Tonight? Okay of course, I will start right away. I'm actually going home right now. Yes, right at this moment.' Hilary looked a little confused, but gave a huge grin anyway and said it was fine. Ah, having the skills to fake a phone call, this is the kind of stuff they should teach you at school.

Turning away from the group, I briskly walked back to my apartment and proceeded to collapse on my bed and fall asleep instantly. Unpacking could wait til later.

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**REVIEW is such an amazing word right? Just fills you with joy and happiness :D :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**I realised that the story was moving quite slowly and I have picked up the pace a little, I think :P **

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 3**

'You useless child. It's your fault that your father died; you took him away from me. Now I have to stare at your nasty face every single day. You should just leave like your pathetic brother.'

My eyes shot open. There was a thin layer of sweat coating my body and my chest was heaving. I hadn't had dreams like this in a while; my sleeping pattern is going to be a mess if this continues. Sitting up, I considered ringing my therapist, Dr Glade (or Dr G, as Ash calls him), I am supposed to if I have any dreams of this kind but he was in England and God knows what time it was there. I glanced at the clock, 3am. I know I won't be able to sleep again so might as well do something productive and distracting. Those boxes aren't going to unpack themselves after all.

…

Four hours later I collapsed on my bed and looked at the clock, 7.30am. Another hour or so til school. I sat up and admired my mad unpacking skills; the room felt full unlike yesterday. There were a few photo frames on the walls, stuffed animals on the bed, the cupboard was full of clothes and the bookshelf was overflowing. This feels more comfortable. But still so empty. My insides churn horribly and my heart feels heavy. Dealing with loneliness has never been my strong suit; in fact, it's the one thing that brings me to my knees… literally.

'Deep breaths Felicity, keep yourself busy', Dr G's voice rang in my head.

I have to keep myself stress free so that I don't have another freaky deaky episode; manic or depression. My mind wandered back to when I was first diagnosed with depression. I was eight and my life was already crashing to a sudden halt. My arms were covered with deep scars; looking so ugly. That was the first time I met Dr G. He still had some black in his hair compared to his current snow white hair. Throughout the whole session I felt uncomfortable sitting with a stranger who didn't care about me and was only talking to me for the money. No words left my mouth that first session and when I left the hospital, my body felt empty and numb.

I shudder at the memory and at the person who took me to the hospital. Conrad Phoenix; my beloved big brother. Just thinking about him hurts; he was and is my everything. No-one can match him in any way. He was smart, not just intelligent but cunning as well. You have to be to look after yourself at the age of 13. You could say our mother hated us because we looked so much like our father. All three of us had the same silky black hair and brilliant green eyes. I had inherited my father's dimples and Conrad had his height. My mother was the opposite of us. She had blonde hair, which was so close to white you'd think she's bleached it. My twin brother, Leo Phoenix, took after my mother. He had the same white hair and intense blue eyes. No-one thought of us as being siblings let alone twins.

The difference in our appearances had never bothered me until my father died. My mother couldn't bear to look at me and Conrad so we were left to fend for ourselves. Leo was showered with love; I had no idea why my mother didn't look at me like she used to. Her eyes were filled with pain and hatred towards me. For six years I wondered what I did wrong, why she hated me, what I could do to win her love. Leo was always praised for whatever he did so when Leo joined the football team (soccer in America) so did I. When he started painting, I did too. Any new activity he took up, I wanted to do it to show my mother that I was the same as him, even better in some things. Of course I was around 9 when Conrad told me that nothing could change how she feels about me, unless I brought my father back to life; not putting all my money on that.

Conrad had the same treatment but he left when he was 13 living by himself and working his ass off. He was trying to start up his own business and when he had enough money he would take me in. Every night I prayed for the day when I would be able to live with him and that finally came when I was 11. It's not like my whole life turned around because I left my mother. Still to this day I wonder what I ever did to make her hate me and if there was anything I could have done.

The marks on my wrists will probably never go away, but I like it that way. It's a reminder of who I am and how much I have improved. It's been a year since I cut, I have felt the urge to but Dr G taught me some techniques that'll distract me and take the urge away. I guess that's another way Conrad saved me, by introducing me to Dr G. He stayed with me through my depression and later when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder but that story's for another day.

8.00am. Time to get ready for school. While I was starting my morning routine, my thoughts drifted to school and the people there. They seemed nice I guess but I was going to leave after 2 years so is there any point in making friends? What if they found out about me, my wrists aren't exactly subtle, they scream messed up kid with serious issues. I guess a full sleeved shirt will be more suitable. And why am I suddenly thinking about others people's opinions? I am bipolar and proud… God that sounds so fake. I just want to get this day over with.

…

'Make sure you complete all of the exercises before next lesson or else, detentions all round'. Miss Teely yelled out to all of us. Maths had always made sense to me; there is something soothing about numbers at the fact that the answer can only be either right or wrong, there is no middle ground.

It's lunch and all the kids are being attracted to the cafeteria like flies to a corpse (excuse my depressing similes, I can't help it). I grab a tray and scowl at the slop thrusted into it. It should be illegal to make us eat this, it's like animal food.

I scanned the cafeteria for safe places to sit and spotted an empty table in the corner. Perfect. I sat down and opened my most recent book; The Road by Cormac McCarthy, one of the bleakest books you will ever read. My mind was so absorbed in the man's trek across America with his son that I didn't notice someone clearing their throat behind me. I felt a sharp tap on my shoulder and turned to glare at the person but was faced with familiar crimson eyes.

'You're in my seat', his deep voice resonated in my ears.

'Does it have your name on it? I don't think so'. I turned back to my book, getting ready to become immersed in bleak America when I heard someone sit across from me. I glanced up and frowned.

'There are no rules against me sitting here'. The bluenette smirked; the bastard knew he was annoying me.

'I never said you couldn't.'

'Your face did.' He turned to look at a table where Tala was sitting, surrounded by people. 'Wouldn't you rather sit with them compared to her all by your lonesome?' He was taking the piss out of me, annoying twat.

'Well, I'm not alone now am I? Thank you so much for sitting with me', I gave him my most sarcastic smile and went back to my book.

Again I felt pinpricks on my skin where he was looking at me, judging me. 'Stop glaring at me, you're freaking me out.' I looked up and was a little taken aback. He looked at me curiously, inspecting every inch of me. It was like he could see inside my mind, the deepest crevices where my worst fears lay. 'What?' I inquired, quite rudely.

'Nothing,' he turned to his bag and pulled out a book of his own; Crime and Punishment. I guess he does have a brain behind his good looks. Wait… what? Good looking? Where did that come from? Get a grip Felicity. I shook my head and tried to focus on my book but the teen in front of me was magnetizing. Every so often I had to look at him; he made me feel self-conscious and… scared. I needed to keep an eye on him and keep control of myself. A bell rang signalling the end of lunch and we both stood up to go to class.

He glanced at me before walking away. What a weird guy.

…

I was the first person in the chemistry lab and took a seat furthest away from the board next to the window. Teens started sauntering into the room until it was almost full after which the teacher arrived.

'Alright class settle down. I am Mr Whitlock and I will be teaching you chemistry this year.' A young man stood in front of the class. He had fluffy brown hair and blue eyes; the girls were already flirting with him and just brushed them off like this was a daily occurrence. Looking at him, it probably is; he's hot to be honest.

The lesson continued with no-one sitting next to me which was alright I guess. The teacher walked around the class helping people who needed it. I flew through the questions and finished before some people had even started. That was the disadvantage of being home schooled by Conrad; he taught me everything before I was meant to know it. Mr Whitlock sat in the empty space next to me and asked if I needed any help to which I replied no. He looked at work and surprise crossed his face.

'You've finished already? That was quick, I think we have a genius among us', he smiled at me warmly. 'I'll let you sit and relax for a while'. He winked at me before walking away to help someone with their hand up.

I watched him walk away and my eyes met ice blue ones. 'You've finished? Jeez are you like super smart or something? By the way, I'm having a little get together after school and I thought you might like to come. Plus, I know Hilary wants to get to know you a little better'.

'Erm, thanks but I'll pass, still getting used to this place and I'm a little tired today.' I turned back to my work, ending the conversation. I didn't really want to get attached to anyone here. It's better to let these 2 years go smoothly without drama. Everyone knows relationships bring drama so it's better to avoid them. Kazuma and Ash are enough for me.

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**Review! Thank you! :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**Please enjoy and REVIEW!**

**I don't own beyblade :)**

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**Chapter 4**

It's strange how tiny pills can affect the mood of a person; whether or not they lose their sanity, how well they can deal with normal life. And if you stop taking them, well, all hell breaks loose. When you are first diagnosed it takes a while to comprehend the magnitude of what has been said to you. Denial is the initial stage and getting past that is quite hard. Obviously the doctors don't know what they are talking about and they are only giving me these pills to repress my mind; this was my first thought when I was faced with the dilemma of swallowing the tablets. I've come a long way since then. Now I take them without hesitating because I know what happens when I neglect to swallow those little capsules. My mind doesn't belong to me anymore; it's like someone else is controlling it, making me feel numb or on top of the world; depending on what kind of episode I am dealing with.

_Bipolar disorder is a psychiatric diagnosis for a mood disorder in which people experience disruptive mood swings that encompass a frenzied state known as mania (or hypomania) and, usually, symptoms of depression._

The Wikipedia definition of bipolar disorder. It sounds so official and cold. If you asked someone who suffered with the illness, they'd tell you something completely different.

This isn't something I do for fun by the way; look up definitions for mental disorders. I pin the blame on Miss Toda, my psychology teacher who decided to give us an assignment on the first lesson. Only the truly sadistic can do that. That is why I am sitting in the library with a textbook full of mental disorders open; the assignment – to pick one and write an essay about it. How fun does that sound?

Picking something I have first-hand experience with is the easiest option but I don't really want to reveal my weakness (Dr G says it's not a weakness; I disagree) to the entire class. I'm sure talking about it will trigger some chemical imbalance in my brain causing it to have an epileptic fit, metaphorically of course.

I smirked at the mental image of a cartoon brain having a fit.

'You seem to be enjoying yourself? Care to let me in on the joke?' a masculine voice whispered.

Oh great, it's him. I sighed and looked up to face the bluenette who sat down; with the same psychology book might I add, in front of me.

'Are you stalking me or something?', I whispered so the librarian wouldn't kick me out.

'Who on Earth would want to stalk you? I'm doing some research, same as you since we are in the same psychology class with the same crazy teacher.' His mouth was upturned at the edges but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. I looked at him curiously until he cleared his throat. 'Something you like?', this time his eyes were dancing with amusement, which annoyed me to no end.

'Pfft, get real.' I was waiting for a reply but didn't get one. Instead I turned back to the book intent to finding an illness to write about as soon as possible so I could get out of here.

I was submerged in the world of disorders so naturally I didn't notice the bell go for the end of school. I was concentrating so hard that I didn't notice the small, black, eight legged creature crawling dangerously close to my hand. I felt something tickling my knuckles and when I looked down, there was a spider… _touching me_. I know what you're thinking; I ask myself this all the time too. I have dealt with much worse but I am still afraid of spiders. It is a common fear and I am a common person but no-one seems to think they freak me out.

So when I saw _that _on my hand I naturally jumped out of my seat and starting shaking my hand like a lunatic whilst repeating, 'OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG' and pulling a very unattractive face.

The crimson eyed teenager jumped up when I did. 'What? What is it? Are you okay?' There was panic in his eyes which I couldn't see due to the fact my hand was flopping like a fish in front of my face.

He grabbed it to stop me from wafting it about. 'What happened?' He asked me slowly as if I was something delicate that would smash at the slightest of jolts.

'Spider… touched… hand… eurgh', my body was still cringing but stopped when I heard supressed laughter coming from the teen.

My eyes narrowed, 'You think this is funny? I have to wash my hand with disinfectant three times and I can't eat with it for at least 2 days. I don't find that funny at all'.

He burst out laughing in the middle of the library which caused both of us to be kicked out. So much for my psychology assignment.

'I haven't laughed like that in a long time, and I mean a seriously long time'. He looked at me weirdly before snorting to himself.

'Well, I am glad that was amusing for some.' I tried to sound cold but couldn't help a bit of laughter from slipping through.

'I wouldn't have pegged you as someone who had a phobia of spiders. Just seems… too normal'.

'Are you saying I'm not usually normal? And you don't even know me so I don't think you can make a decision like that', I raised an eyebrow at him.

'You are far from normal. And I am a very good judge of character,' he replied before walking towards the school doors. 'See you tomorrow Phoenix'.

I unconsciously sat down on one of the seats, staring after him. He is a weird guy. He doesn't have many friends which is a little strange since he is very good looking. Girls usually go for the bad boy thing and he screamed trouble. He never smiles (excluding today's fiasco), he's a lone wolf, he rides a motorbike – I mean, how much more _bad _can you get? He has a beautiful face, strong but elegant. His eyes are his best feature; deep crimson orbs which can see through anything. His hair was a dark blue near his neck and a lighter shade on top. His body is gorgeous too. I started blushing furiously when I realised what I was thinking.

Why doesn't this guy have friends again? Come to think of it, I don't even know his name.

After a few more minutes of daydreaming about the mystery teen, I snapped out of my trance and realised that school finished half an hour ago. So what the hell was I doing sitting here? Rolling my eyes at myself, I got up to leave before colliding with a hard body.

I felt a pair of hands encircling my waist before I could hit the ground. I looked up to see a pair of cocky ice blue eyes.

'You are very welcome,' Tala smirked at me from above, still not letting go of my waist. 'Helping damsels in distress is my duty after all'.

'Damsel my ass,' I stood up and pulled myself out of his grip. I was about to turn around when I remembered something.

I put on my innocent face before asking, 'Do you know someone at this school; he-.'

'Yes, I know a lot of people at this school.' He grinned.

'Let me finish! He has two toned blue hair and reddy – purply eyes. I know he's in my psychology class and-'

'Why?' The redhead's smile vanished and he looked at me curiously. 'I do know him, but I am curious as to why you want to know.'

'He's just talked to me a couple of times and he never told me his name. I was just wondering'. Getting angry at him wasn't the best tactic at the moment; just play sweet and innocent.

'Kai Hiwatari. He's a junior like us. One thing though; I know you don't like people telling you what to do but I would stay away from him. He's not… the nicest person'. The redhead kept a flat expression on his face.

Hmm… he has a reputation round here for being unsociable. So why is he so talkative around me? I noticed Tala looking at me strangely so I gave him a fake smile and said thanks before walking towards the school doors.

'Seriously, stay away from him. Hang with us instead,' he smiled a little before going towards the library.

I wonder what the bluenette did to offend him so much. I shrugged to myself and began walking home; thoughts filled with the crimson eyed teen… Kai Hiwatari. Interesting name – I thought smiling.

Oh shit! I have psychology! My brain went into panic mode as I ran around a lamppost a few times before crashing into an old woman.

'I am so sorry ma'am. I was panicking and I just, went a little overboard,' I looked at her with my puppy dog eyes (which never fail… usually).

She glared at me and muttered something under her breath before storming off in the opposite direction.

This is not a good day for me. First spiders and now old ladies, what is wrong with me?

I sulked all the way home.

…

'This is my problem. I have no idea which disorder to pick. Help me Kaz!' I yelled down the phone.

'Calm down. Choose something that you are comfortable with. Maybe multiple personality disorder? That is quite an interesting one and the symptoms are fairly different from what you experience. Speaking of which, how have you been holding up?', a smooth, deep voice on the other side of the phone enquired.

'I'm good I guess. It's just… a little lonely. But otherwise it's alright', I bit my lip. Holding things in wasn't good for me but I couldn't let him know I was upset.

'You don't sound so sure. Well, you know you can give me a ring anytime and I will pick up. My meeting is about to begin so I will speak to you soon. Bye Felicity.'

'Later Kaz'. The phone turned off with a click and the apartment was silent. I could hear faint tapping from the floor above; someone was probably jumping around. The washing machine and dryer were also making a whirring noise in the kitchen. It's amazing what you can hear when everything else around you is silent; it's quite hypnotic.

I lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. I was doing okay. It's not like I was lying to Kazuma but I just didn't tell him the full truth; that's not lying, I think. Plus, I've met some interesting people. The image of the bluenette flitted into my mind and I instantly tried to force it out. Don't think about him, he's not worth the time or brain energy.

I sighed and sat up to start my assignment. This was going to be a long night.

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	5. Chapter 5

**Thank to the people who reviewed! It means a lot to me and helps me improve :)**

**I don't own beyblade, unfortunately.**

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**Chapter 5**

Mental note to self – don't stay up all night for a stupid assignment. Sleep is much better.

I literally dragged myself to school today and am now tempted to fall asleep in this pointless physics lesson. Who actually needs to know about tension in strings? I am sure as hell not going to use it.

During my internal rant, the door suddenly slammed open and a tall girl walked in. The teacher stood speechless while the girl merely sat down in an empty seat; which happened to be next to me. The poor woman at the front was frozen with her eyes wide open, staring at the rough teen.

'Erm… s..s..sorry but who a..a…are you?', the timid woman stuttered.

'I was suspended and now I'm here. That's all'. The girl sat back in her seat, her feet stretched out in front of her lazily.

I glanced in her direction. She was a pretty girl; her hair barely reached her shoulders and was a rich blue colour. Her eyes were slanted and pale yellow in colour which gave her a dangerous look. She was quite a curvy girl and the clothes she was wearing accentuated that; skin tight black jeans and a tight tank top which was also black.

Everyone else around her seemed to either disregard her or look at her with contempt while the girl just sat there staring out of the window. The feeble teacher also accepted her presence and turned back to the board to begin teaching again.

…

Damn physics homework – why does she give us so much? She's such a weakling anyway; I should hire someone to threaten her. My dark mutterings went unnoticed by the swarms of people around me as I walked into the cafeteria. My eyes scanned the room and fell upon a full table of teens which included Tala, Hilary and Emily; just the people I wanted to avoid however, my wishes were not to be followed and I groaned when I heard a shrill voice call out from the other side of the room.

'Hey Felicity! Come sit with us, there's loads of space!', Hilary bounced on her feet waving her hands in the air while the boys around her stared; obviously noticing her mammarial composures (ahem ahem, I mean boobies) moving up and down. I rolled my eyes at the neanderthals and the immature behaviour of the girl before forcing myself to sit at their table.

Tala and another boy with blonde hair and blue eyes made space for me to sit between them. I glanced at my usual table and noticed that the bluenette wasn't sitting there like he usually did. Wonder what happened to him. He is here today because I saw him in chemistry sitting at the back on his own. I never noticed this but we are quite alike; we exist on the fringes of society, never fully getting involved. I know my reason for this but I wonder what he is hiding.

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud gasp and an annoying voice which whispered, 'Omg, the weirdo's back. I can't believe they lifted her suspension. She deserved to be expelled after what she did.'

I followed the gazes of everyone at the table and my eyes met the same blue haired girl from physics.

'What did she do?', I asked, curious about the female.

'She punched a teacher in the face', Tala replied before Hilary butted in- 'not just a teacher, it was Mr Whitlock!'

'There had to have been a reason', I suggested. No-one really goes around punching people in the face. These guys probably don't know the other side of the story.

'She was spouting some bullshit about being molested by him or something. I mean, its complete lies. Everyone knows Mr Whitlock would never do that, he's like, the nicest teacher in the world', the brown haired girl babbled on about the attractive teacher while my mind started wandering.

Someone wouldn't lie about that unless; it actually happened and no-one believed them, they wanted an excuse to get out of school or they were attention seeking. The attention seeking wouldn't necessarily be for the wrong reasons. The intentions could be legitimate but obviously that's not the way to go about it.

I suddenly remembered being punished at school for throwing a board rubber at another child's head because I wanted to be sent home so my mother would be forced to pick me up. The school called home but no-one answered up so I was forced to stay with the principal all day until the end of school when she came to pick both me and Leo up. Of course the principal tried to tell her what I had done but she merely ignored him. When he changed the subject and congratulated her on Leo's recent performance in the football match, she beamed at him and said thank you numerous times. After that, my attempts at seeking her attention became more and more severe and other people around me were at risk. My behaviour was much more violent and I was threatened by expulsion; even then, my mother didn't even spare a glance in my direction. Instead of spitting out insults like she did previously, she simply ignored me which hurt ten times more.

'Helloooo… anyone home?', ice blue eyes filled my gaze and I snapped out of my painful memories.

'Yeah, yeah I'm fine', I replied slightly shaken at the sudden recollection of the past. I shifted to look at the blue haired girl. Her eyes looked angry but there was something deeper; something that I could relate to, pain. I suddenly felt the urge to sit with her so I picked up my food and began walking towards the girl.

'Hey, where are you going?', the red head asked curiously before realising where I was headed. 'Are you nuts? Did you hear what she did? Sitting there is social suicide! We all made a pact to ignore her; she treated Mr W like shit so that's what's going to happen to her. Everyone hates her; seriously don't even think about it.'

I felt a surge of anger rise up within me and I twisted round sharply to look at him.

Our family has a certain glare that we like to use; it is sometimes referred to as the 'Phoenix glare' (the name given by Ash himself). They say it is so fierce that it can knock the wind out of someone instantly. And that is exactly what happened to Tala.

His eyes were wide open, shock running through them. His mouth slightly agape. I smiled internally. The poor bastard was just sitting there staring at me. Poor guy, he looks so scared. If my glare does this to him I'd hate to see what would have happened if Conrad glared at him.

I turned around and continued walking towards the girl. I could hear whispers around me but I chose to ignore them as I sat down and slammed my tray on the table to get her attention. Her head snapped back to look at the intruder and her eyes narrowed.

'What do you want?', her voice was low and dangerous.

'I'm just eating lunch', I casually took a bite out of my food and watched the girl out of the corner of my eye. She stared at me for a few more seconds before gawking at her food again; looking defeated, and slightly scared.

We sat together in silence eating our lunch. The occupants of the table on the other end of the cafeteria were muttering furiously, shocked that someone would disobey them like that. I smirked a little. That'll show them, stuck up bitches. I knew there was another side to her story and they just weren't willing to accept it.

I focused my attention on the girl.

'So, what's your name?' I asked, curious as to what kind of name the girl would have.

'I was named after one of the worst hurricanes in the history of America', she replied quietly, staring at her food. 'The one which killed over 1800 people'.

Worst hurricane? The only one I know is Katrina. That'll probably be it. 'I'm sure that's not why your parents called you that'.

'My father told me so', her eyes were emotionless and I involuntarily shivered at the pain in her eyes.

'And your last name?'

'Beaumont'.

'Katrina Beaumont. If you ask me, that's a beautiful name', I tried to make eye contact but she kept her head down. 'You were so confident earlier when you walked into the classroom. What happened?'

She lifted her head, looking me straight in the eyes, 'It's only the first day but I'm already so tired. I can't take any more of this.' Her yellow eyes welled up and I patted her on the knee.

'Hey now, sorry for asking you all this', I whispered soothingly, 'by the way, I heard about what you did and I think there is more to it than what everyone else thinks'.

She smiled at me weakly, 'thanks'. She noticed the clock on the wall. 'I should go; I have a meeting with the school counsellor'.

She stood up and took a deep breath. Instantly her shoulders pulled back and her head tilted upwards; she looked like she owned the school. I guess I'm not the only one who puts on a mask when I'm feeling weak, must be a survival thing.

After she left, a familiar orange haired girl walked towards me. I groaned and proceeded to put on a sarcastic smile.

'Emmy! How are you these days?', my tone was overly cheerful.

'Actually it's Emily. And I am doing okay', she said robotically. 'I saw-'.

'Jeez Emmy, you need to put a bit more emotion into your words. You're going to scare people away like that. I'm glad I could help but I really have to go. Fingers crossed, I won't be seeing you later', the fake smile never left my face as I finished my speech and sauntered out of the cafeteria leaving an angry Emily behind.

Serves her right. They probably sent her to tell me what punishment they will bestow on me and all that crap. Thank God I've never been one to run with the 'in' crowd, they all seem like a bunch of fake whiners who get off on making other people feel small.

Walking down the corridor, I passed a group of freshman girls whispering to each other and glancing at another young girl who was standing on her own.

There is seriously something wrong with this school. It's like a game to them; choosing people to ignore and bully. Kai and Katrina are both on the edges of the school social system. I might join them. I smirked, it seems much cozier there.

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	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for reviewing! Enjoy!**

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 6**

**Tala POV**

That stupid bitch is going to ruin everything. It took me such a long time to get the status quo right in this school. I had already removed all potential threats and then she came along. I'll just have to get rid of her as well. Hiwatari was the main threat before; he is the heir to a billion dollar company and I must admit his looks rival even my own.

That other girl, Katrina something; she could have gotten that idiotic teacher fired on the basis of sexual assault. He is my link to all of the teachers, even the principal. If he was to leave then so would my control over those useless adults.

I reduced both of them to nothing. The whole school knows to avoid them; I made sure of it. I finally had that place at my fingertips – the students and teachers but then she showed up. I thought she would be just like all those other girls; practically licking my feet but she has attitude. She would have made an excellent girlfriend; I could have trained her to be more obedient and then I would finally have everything. After all, every King needs a Queen and Hilary is too stupid to even consider.

Focus Tala, focus. I'll ask her one more time, she might change her mind. If not, I'll have to make sure she doesn't cause any trouble. Kick her down and then make sure she stays there.

**Normal POV**

'Well done class! Almost everyone got a B or higher! Round of applause everyone!' Miss Toda was practically spitting out happiness with every word she said. 'I'll be back in a moment kids, need to grab some papers from the office.'

I looked at down the assignment I had worked my ass off for, A+. To be perfectly honest, I did deserve it; oh Felicity you big headed bitch… I really need to stop talking to myself. I frowned at my inner monologue and cocked my head to the side to glance at the bluenette on the other side of the classroom. I was surprised to see him looking straight at me and when he saw me blush (I know, I'm such a girl) he smirked and waved his hand at me. I narrowed my eyes in fake annoyance and turned back to face the front, intent on ignoring the good looking teen.

A blonde haired boy with blue eyes walked past me, shoving my shoulder so my arm fell off the desk. It was the same boy I sat with in the cafeteria when the whole Katrina fiasco occurred.

'Ow, what the hell was that for?' I yelled aggressively. 'A sorry would be nice.'

He didn't say or do anything to show that he even knew I was there. I got out of my seat and strode towards him as he sat down and closed his eyes. Before I knew it my hands were clenching his collar and I was holding his face close to mine. His bewildered eyes opened instantly and he stared at me; waiting for me to make a move.

I felt a large hand on my shoulder and turned to see Kai looking down at me. My hands didn't leave the blonde boy's collar. The bluenette shook his head and told me to sit down. I glared at him for a few seconds before letting go and returning to my seat.

Miss Toda shuffled back into the classroom, oblivious to what just transpired.

'Alright, now, who wants to give a little talk about the disorder they chose to write about?' No-one put their hand up. 'Come on now! If no-one volunteers I'll have to choose someone at random. Okay then, that's how it's going to be. Let's see now.'

The young teacher closed her eyes and ran her finger down the class register. 'Kenny! You're up first!'

A short boy with scruffy hair and glasses stood up and dawdled to the front of the classroom. Poor guy looked so nervous; it was quite sweet to see him squirm up there.

'I…' he gulped before continuing, 'I researched schizophrenia –'

I yawned and looked out of the window, not bothering to listen to the socially awkward teen. The sky looked much bluer today and the clouds looked fluffier. When I was young I used to imagine sitting on them, moulding pieces of them in my hands. It was only when I was older that I realised I would just fall to my doom if I tried.

The teacher's sickeningly cheerful voice brought me back from gaga land. 'Next up, Mr Hiwatari'. Miss Toda was definitely on something today; it is unnatural to sound that happy. Maybe she has a thing for the young teen. I smirked at the image of her fangirling over the bluenette and had to suppress my laughter.

Kai strode up to the front of the class and spoke in that deep, velvety voice of his (what is wrong me me?), 'I researched sociopathy; also known as Antisocial personality disorder. The-'

I remembered meeting a girl who was a sociopath in the psychiatric hospital. It is quite a scary disorder, for her but also for the people around her. Her manipulative skills were absolutely amazing; and her charisma was waaay up there. But her anger was violent and frightening. People with this disorder also have no regard for other people's feelings which is where the antisocial bit comes in. I wonder why Kai chose it.

I looked back at the teen who had just finished and was being patted on the back by Miss Toda. 'Alright, now I think we have time for one more person. Hmm… Hilary! Come on up!'

The girl bounced to the front of the class and began. 'Okay so, I like, researched manic depressive disorder which is like called Bipolar whatever now and basically, the person is like really happy one minute and the next they just wanna kill themselves. It's super weird. And-'

I am honestly astounded at how stupid this girl is. She's gotten everything wrong! But I can't correct her because that just sounds suspicious. I started becoming slightly nervous and was squirming in my seat. My hands were tapping against the table rapidly and I felt as if my chest was being compressed. I needed to calm myself. Deep breath and hold… 1…2…3…breathe out and repeat. Why isn't Miss Toda correcting her! I wonder what she got on the essay, Miss Toda did say the majority of people got B or above, didn't she? Hilary was probably the minority.

I closed my eyes and lay my head flat against the table facing the window. I tuned out the superficial bimbo at the front and focused on soothing noises; wind making whistling noises when it hits trees or ocean waves crashing on the sand. I shut my eyes and went on a journey to the beach; children running around laughing while some were swimming in the sea. It's been such a long time since I went to the seaside. I should go this weekend.

After a while, I opened my eyes and jumped back in my seat.

'You scared the hell out of me' I gasped, glaring at the tall teen who stood in front of me.

'Are you okay?' he looked a little worried, 'you were completely gone'.

'Yeah I'm fine, just a little tired is all,' I sighed before getting up to go to the cafeteria. 'You coming?'

Kai looked at me for a second before walking behind me. He opened his mouth and closed it again. I laughed internally, he wants to make sure I'm okay, ha!

I stepped in front of him, stopping him suddenly before giving him my best innocent look, 'I'm fine, honest'.

I could see the surprise on his face which quickly turned into a smirk. I ignored it and continued walking; out of the blue I felt someone whack me round the head.

'Ouch! What are you doing?' I looked at him angrily.

'Nothing', he replied and made his way to lunch. I stared at him in disbelief.

Stupid Kai thinks he can hit me round the head. Just because I looked at him like that doesn't mean he can go round abusing me.

…

The cafeteria was full. But there was one almost empty table right at the edge of the room; the sole occupant – Katrina Beaumont.

The bluenette started to make his way out of the room.

'Where you going?', I asked him feeling a little embarrassed since we hardly knew each other.

'There's no space', he glanced around before looking at me again.

I rolled my eyes, grabbed his arm and dragged him to sit with Katrina. There were whispers coming from all around us but I forced them out and sat at the table.

'Hey, can we sit here?' I smiled at her.

She looked at me and nodded, 'go ahead'.

I sat and made the bluenette sit as well.

'You two probably know each other right?', trying to ease the awkwardness and make conversation.

'Of course' Kai smirked, 'she's the one who gave that paedophilic teacher a black eye. Well done for that by the way'.

I frowned at him and turned my attention to Katrina. She looked him up and down; probably asking herself whether he was a friend or foe.

'Thank you', she replied. Friend it is. I smiled to myself and was about to bite into my lovely looking sandwich when I heard someone clear their throat behind me.

'Can I talk to you please?' Tala asked, very politely might I add. I glanced at the other two sitting at the table. Katrina had her head down and was staring at her food while Kai was shooting daggers at the redhead.

I sighed and followed him out of the cafeteria, 'make it quick Valkov. My sandwich is waiting.'

'Look, I was out of order the other day. I wanted to apologise and was wondering what you were doing tomorrow'. He smiled his very charming smile. I was still sceptical of the redhead's true intentions.

'Apology accepted and I'm going to the beach.' I answered flatly.

'The beach? Who are you going with?'

Shit. I can't say on my own because he'll want to come. 'Katrina and Kai.' I replied without thinking.

'I didn't know that you three were that close' he raised an eyebrow at me.

'Yeah well, there are a lot of things you don't know then. I'll be going now' I tried to keep my cool as I walked back to my seat but ended up running half way.

'If anyone asks, we are all going to the beach tomorrow' I frantically announced.

Katrina looked at me with a confused expression while Kai raised an eyebrow.

'He asked me what I was doing this weekend. I had to make something up!' I argued my case. 'We aren't actually going'.

'The devil himself likes you' Katrina said sarcastically, 'you must feel so proud'.

I looked at her a little shocked and hurt. Was she jealous or did she just hate him? I think it's the latter; no way would she ever like someone like him. But I don't even know her that well.

I felt another slap around the head and glared at the bluenette. 'You need to stop doing that!'

'You were spacing out again', he leaned on his hand and looked at me with interested eyes. My stomach started doing flip flops and I forced myself to look away. I couldn't get involved with anyone. I needed to get myself sorted out properly before I even thought about anyone else.

The table was quiet as we all ate. I guess we aren't big on talking; I quite like that. Gives you a chance to clear your head.

'Why the beach?', curious yellow eyes asked.

'Because I'm going to the beach this weekend.' I took another bite out of my sandwich.

'I don't know about him, but I didn't agree.' Katrina said.

'Him has a name' Kai interrupted sharply. We both ignored him and he went back to his food muttering under his breath.

'I never said you guys were going'

'Who are you going with then?'

'No-one'

They both looked at me with a mixture of surprise and… pity. I looked down at my hands. Pity was the one emotion that I absolutely despised; I never needed anyone's pity. It makes me feel small and worthless, I hate it.

We sat in awkward silence until the bell rang for the end of lunch.

'See you guys on Monday', I smiled weakly before walking towards my next lesson.

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	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it's been a while but we had guests over and I was kidnapped to do some of the cooking even though I can't cook.**

**Anyhoo, I'll let you get on with it :)**

**I don't own Beyblade :(**

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**Chapter 7**

The alarm on my phone started ringing at 5 am; on a Monday might I add, for no apparent reason. I was not in the mood for school today. The weekend had gone so fast; my visit to the beach on Saturday was relaxing. I spent the whole day sitting on the sand staring out at the waves and eating ice cream, I also made a sand castle with a family I had met. Before I knew it, the sky was dark and everyone had gone. I stayed a little while longer, enjoying the sounds of water crashing on the rocks; it was quite hypnotic and I was lost in my own world for a while until I realised how late it was.

Sunday was uneventful. Spent the whole day running errands; cleaning the apartment, finishing all my homework and other bits and bobs.

Now it's Monday and I have no motivation to go to school. I knew that I will have ups and downs in my mood that peak a little higher or lower than normal people but I had to deal with it. There are ways to stop yourself from falling into depression or mania if you can spot the symptoms early enough. Right now, I had to force myself to get ready otherwise I would be stuck lying here for the whole day wallowing in self despair.

I looked in the mirror. My skin looked a little pasty, and my eyes had bags under them. I had been sleeping perfectly fine but I still looked tired – and felt tired. I needed to find something productive to do so I could keep my mind busy.

I grabbed some paper and a few pencils from the shelf and sat down to draw. The angled my pencil perfectly against the blank sheet and froze; this was the hardest bit, figuring out what to draw. My hand started moving of its own accord. The pencil lines were faint and drew an outline of an eye. Slowly, the whole picture starting coming together; I lost all awareness of what was around me, instead focussing solely on the image that was being created by the pencil.

Half an hour later I snapped out of my possessed state and looked at what I had drawn. There was a single eye in the middle of the page. The eyelashes were thick and there were tears collected in the corner. However, the eye itself looked soulless. There was no emotion in it; it was as if someone had taken the essence of the human and left them as an empty shell. I shivered and put the image face down on the bed.

I got ready slowly. My heart felt like it was made of lead and my stomach was bubbling even though there was nothing in it. I grabbed my pills, not feeling very hungry and left the apartment.

…

'Okay class, today we will be talking about-'

I stared out of the window not focussing on any of the words coming out of Mr Whitlock's mouth. It was bright outside; the sun was shining brilliantly and I could see a park in the distance full of young children without a care in the world. I would be so nice to be that age again; not really aware of your surroundings and having someone take care of you.

'Felicity?'

I heard a voice in my ear and looked up. The young chemistry teacher was smiling at me, 'the bell rang five minutes ago. You'll be late for your next lesson.'

I nodded and made my way out of the classroom. I had spent the whole hour daydreaming; I will definitely fail at this rate plus all the teachers will make my life more miserable than it already is.

'Hey, how was your weekend?' a female voice called out from beside me. 'Did you go to the beach?'

'Yeah, it was alright. Relaxing', short and sweet; I didn't really feel like talking.

'This is my class, see you later', Katrina branched off into her lesson.

I dawdled to my next class having no motivation to learn. When I arrived Miss Toda had already started teaching and I slipped into my seat when she was facing the board. I resumed my activity of staring out of the window until I heard the words, 'group work'. Oh joy.

'Just for this hour you will be working in groups of three which I have already selected. You will fill in a sheet each about the symptoms of a particular illness and how they can be cured. The groups are:'

I stopped listening, waiting for my name to leave her lips.

'Felicity, Hilary and Kai. Group 4 Max –'

Great, I'm with the bimbo. Miss Toda finished calling out all of the names and everyone starting shuffling around to sit with their groups. I stayed in my seat and Kai stayed in his while Hilary stood in the middle of the classroom looking at both of us. I sighed and stood up; any other day I would have fought to stay in my seat but alas, I have no energy at the moment.

'Okay so, what do we do like, I wasn't listening?' the bimbo speaks.

I roll my eyes and ignore her, turning to Kai instead who, it seemed, was trying to make his pencil spontaneously combust by staring at it too hard.

I looked at my sheet; Schizophrenia. I started filling it in when I felt a sharp poke on my arm. I looked up to see big brown eyes looking at me.

'This is group work and you are like not acting as part of a group' she complained.

I simply slid the sheet to her and she copied all of the information down while I put my head on the table and closed my eyes. It was only the second period but I was already worn out. My thoughts went back to the eye I drew. If Kazuma saw that he would freak out and tell me to speak to Dr G. To be honest, I really want to but he's probably busy and he isn't exactly my psychiatrist anymore. I should get a new one here but it'll be so hard to find someone I actually like.

My thoughts were interrupted by someone's warm minty breath hitting my ear. I shot up, scaring the boy next to me.

'I was just checking if you were alive', Kai said defensively.

I just looked at him and went back into my sleeping position before I heard the whiny voice complaining again. I sat up and finished the rest of the sheet which she, again, proceeded to copy.

At the end of this pointless exercise Miss Toda gave the whole class a lecture about how important team work is and that in the real world we will have to work with other people. I was dying for the bell to ring so that I could go to the nurse's office and get sent home; I couldn't take any more of this.

As soon as I stood up after the bell rang, someone grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the classroom. The tall bluenette took me into the parking lot and suddenly forced a motorbike helmet on my head.

'Ow', I mumbled under my breath. I didn't really care where we were going, as long as it wasn't here.

He sat on the bike and motioned for me to sit behind him. I held on to his waist as we set off, the school disappearing behind us.

It wasn't the first time I had been on a motorbike. Ash went through a phase where all he would use was his bike but after he crashed it in the second week he put up his helmet for good. I prefer riding without a helmet but I knew the bluenette wouldn't let me; even though he had that 'bad boy' image, he seemed like a safety freak. I let out a smirk and looked up as I felt the motorbike slowing down.

I took off my helmet and was pleasantly surprised. In front of me was a large blue lake and a hill of green grass next to it. On the other side of the lake was another expanse of grass and trees surrounded the whole area. The only sounds I could hear were birds and small animals accompanied with the sound of the water gently flowing.

I walked to the hill and sat down on making myself comfortable. A little while later I felt the grass next to me move as the crimson eyed teen joined me. We sat there for a while staring out at the lake and I felt peaceful. My heart was becoming lighter as I breathed in that fresh air and relaxed my mind. Dr G always said I should try hypnosis but this was so much better; I just need a place like this to visit whenever I'm feeling down.

'Are you going to tell me what's been bothering you?' the deep voice spoke next to me.

I didn't know what to tell him. I wanted to confide in someone, it's hard keeping everything to yourself. Back in England I had a few outlets; I could cry, scream, shout in front of them and they would just listen quietly, holding me and comforting me. Here, I had no-one, not even a cat to yell at. I swallowed with great difficulty, it was like my throat had been cut off and nothing would come out.

Suddenly, the bluenette's hand grabbed on to the other side of my head and pulled me towards him. My head was on his shoulder and his fingers were tangled in my hair. He smelled like cologne and my stomach lurched. Tears suddenly sprung to my eyes as I hid my face in his sleeve, not wanted him to see my weak side.

'Just cry,' he said staring out at the lake.

I froze for a moment before I felt the dam breaking and floods of tears ran down my cheeks. I felt him turn so my face ended up hidden in his chest while his other hand ran up and down my back and his chin was on top of my head. My hands gripped his shirt while I cried my eyes out.

…

I felt lighter with no more tears left. It was nice to know that someone cared, even a little. Kai was still holding me, even after my emotional episode as I calmed down and composed myself. I realised how we were sat; I was in his lap sitting perpendicular to him so my cheek rested on his chest. My left hand was on my leg while my right was gripping his shirt. Both of his hands were wrapped around me and his nose was making a pattern on my head.

My heart started beating at an inhumane rate. My scalp was tingling as he traced over the same pattern again and again while his fingers made other random movements over my body. I slowly let go of his shirt and looked up at him.

He was staring at me intently, as if I would attack him any moment; which was a possibility to be honest. I dropped my head back down and lifted myself out his lap. His hands stayed frozen for a few seconds before moving to his sides, letting me stand up. I stretched my legs, figuring out what to say.

'I was stressed', a lame excuse, I know.

'Liar', his voice was flat and sharp.

I sighed and sat down next to him saying nothing. He turned to look at me, which I hated due to the fact that his eyes were so intense, I could literally get lost in them.

'Could I guess?' his tone was a little more light hearted.

I nodded, still enticed by his crimson orbs.

He frowned for a moment, 'Depression?'

I opened my mouth to say something before closing it again.

'So depression is one of the symptoms' he mumbled to himself before thinking again.

'Schizophrenia? You knew a lot about it in class today', he looked at me hopefully. His smile fell when I shook my head. He went back to thinking again.

I lay down on my back staring at the clouds above me. I read in a book somewhere that when you cry, hormones are released that relieve stress which is why we cry tears. I felt like a load had been taken of my chest but I think that was more to do with the person sitting next to me than the crying itself. I don't feel as lonely anymore.

'Please just tell me'

I looked at him. His head was cocked to the side and his brows were furrowed. I couldn't hold back a chuckle, he looked too cute.

I sat up and smiled to no-one in particular. 'I'm bipolar'.

There was a slight pause. 'That was my second guess', he said and I snorted before turning red. How attractive did that sound.

He smirked and lay down. I joined him in staring at the blue sky. Slowly I felt myself nodding off, tired from all the crying I had done. My mind drifted to his reaction when I told him. He didn't reject me… he didn't call me a freak, or emotionally unstable. He didn't even pity me.

My eyes closed as I fell into a comfortable sleep.

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**For some reason I wasn't too keen on this chapter. Tell me what you think please! Review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**I was staring at my laptop screen for ages trying to figure out what to write. Writer's block sucks :P Finally got something :D Thank you reviewers! It means a lot! **

**Hope you like it!**

**I don't own Beyblade :(**

* * *

**Chapter 8**

A cool breeze hit my right cheek while my left one was pressed against something soft and tickly. My mind was still hazy and I slowly shuffled around trying to figure out where I was. There was a large leather jacket draped over me which had a fleecy material on the inside. It smelled like…

My brain suddenly focused as I turned around to see Kai lying on his side, fast asleep. I shuffled towards him and studied his face. He had an angular jaw and a strong nose but his ears were quite small and cute which made me smile. My hand started moving towards his face without me realising and my finger positioned itself just above his bottom lip. My mind finally caught up with my hand and I forced myself to pull away from him. I sighed and stared out at the lake.

I hadn't heard from Ash or Kazuma in a while; maybe they had forgotten about me. The sensible part of my mind argued back and said that they were probably busy running the business and all that but since when have I ever listened to the sensible part? The scarred part speaks so much louder but I have to learn to ignore it, which takes time and energy; energy that I just don't have.

The teen next to me stirred and became still again, chest moving rhythmically up and down. He looked so peaceful. I suddenly wondered what time it was; the sky looked dark and stars were beginning to appear.

8:00pm. It was quite late and I had some homework to finish, plus, I'm sure Kai would have some things to do as well.

I moved towards the teen and hesitantly shook him.

'Kai, Kai, wake up', my voice was barely a whisper.

He didn't respond and I shook him a little harder and spoke louder, becoming impatient. It was like he was in a coma; I was shaking him violently and literally shouting in his ear but he didn't even stir. I sat back and sighed. I had always been a light sleeper, the smallest of noises waking me up instantly. Conrad was the same and so was Kazuma. Ash on the other hand… I smiled to myself thinking about all the times I had to wake up the blonde boy from his deep slumber.

I suddenly had an idea. I jogged over to the side of the lake, cupped my hands and filled them with water. I smirked as I thought about how the bluenette would react to his wake up call. I stooped down next to him and suddenly opened my hands; water falling on to his handsome face.

Bright crimson eyes opened in surprise as he shot and started searching for the person responsible. I calmly stayed in the position I was in, a huge smirk on my face waiting for his eyes to meet mine. His eyes narrowed as he noticed me and he slowly stood up. He hadn't said a word and I was becoming slightly uncomfortable.

His hands swiftly grabbed my waist and he hoisted me over his shoulder walking towards the expanse of water. I was thrashing around in his arms, not wanting to become completely soaked but he held on to me tightly.

Without thinking I grabbed his butt and squeezed which caused him to jump and drop me on the ground. He stared at me for a few seconds while I was sitting on the ground staring back up at him, unsure of what he would do next. He raised an eyebrow and started to laugh.

I was beyond confused. I had just groped his behind and he was laughing? What?

I stood up without saying anything and began walking towards his motorbike, feeling a little annoyed and confused. I felt a hand on my head but ignored it. He was walking beside me still chuckling to himself.

'If you wanted to touch me so bad you should have just asked', his eyes sparkled with amusement.

My mind flitted back to the memory of my finger hovering over his lips. I blushed a deep red which was noticed by the bluenette.

'I didn't want to get thrown into the lake', was my flat reply as I tried to mask my embarrassment.

I realised his hand was still on my head; my scalp was tingling and I had to fight the urge to physically push the teen away from me.

'Where do you live? I'll drop you off at home', he said grabbing a helmet from the bike.

'In front of that diner in town, Edna's I think it's called.' I just wanted to go home and forget about the attractive teen standing right next to me.

We got to my apartment in no time and I slid off the motorbike, putting the helmet on the back. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see a familiar group of teenagers standing outside the diner. Kai noticed them too as he took off his helmet and scowled at them.

'Thanks for the ride… and the other thing', I was a little unsure about how to thank the bluenette. I'm not much of a 'thank you' person; people usually know when I'm grateful so I don't bother which is a little rude but I don't like showing my feelings too openly.

'Don't hold it in, it's bad for you', he replied sternly.

I smiled weakly and nodded before turning around and walking towards my apartment. He waited until I entered the building after which he revved his bike loudly causing the teens in front of the diner to turn and look at the bluenette. I smiled to myself and got ready to fall into a deep sleep.

…

'So where were you yesterday? I didn't see you at lunch', Katrina asked quietly.

'I… I wasn't feeling too good so Kai took me home', I replied as honestly as I could.

Her eyes opened in surprise and she gave me a rare smile. 'What's going on with you two anyway? There are so many rumours floating around. Everyone is saying that Kai took Tala's 'bitch' away.'

I choked on my drink. 'Excuse me?'

'I didn't say it. It's everyone else' she said apologetically.

'Why does everyone think I'm Tala's 'bitch'. The day I go out with him is the day you can have my laptop and that will be never just to let you know'

The bright blue haired girl smiled, obviously enjoying my discomfort and anger.

I attacked my sandwich with my teeth, chewing it like a savage. Katrina looked at me with a worried expression on her face.

The missing person from our table joined us with something that resembled vomit in his tray.

'What is that?' Katrina asked looking disgusted.

'I have no idea' the bluenette scoffed, staring at the green slime. He swivelled in his seat to smirk at me. 'So, I heard you're Tala's bird'.

I froze and narrowed my eyes, glaring at him before slapping him round the head. 'I am not anyone's 'bird'. Don't call me that, I don't belong to anyone'. I hated the fact the men think they can just own women. Makes my blood boil. 'I don't even know how this started.'

'Ask him' Katrina said simply. 'I'll bet you anything he made it up. I think he likes you, or wants to use you'.

I sighed and glanced at Kai wanting to hear his opinion. I was surprised to see he looked a little annoyed at the blue haired girl. She noticed as well but just ignored him. I raised an eyebrow. 'Tell me as well', I whined in a childlike manner. These two really made me act differently; happier even.

'Tell you what?' Kai asked, confused.

'You're having secret telepathic conversations and I want to know what you're talking about'

They both looked at me like I was crazy before bursting out into laugher.

'You two do that a lot', was my response.

'We aren't having 'secret' conversations. Jeez, I was only looking at him with his miffed expression wondering what was wrong.' Katrina explained.

I was hesitant to believe her but left it anyway. I noticed the familiar redhead leaving the cafeteria and I jogged out to confront him. The other two saw him and nodded at me, Katrina smirking before being kicked by Kai. I snorted, they were so immature.

'Tala' I called out in the empty corridor.

He turned around and smiled widely when he saw me.

'Hey sunshine, how've you been?' He put his arm around my shoulder which I instantly shrugged off.

'Have you heard the rumours?' I got straight to the point.

His eyed opened wide in fake ignorance, 'rumours?'.

'You know what I'm talking about! Stop them please'

'Now, I thought you didn't care what other people thought' he smiled at me condescendingly. 'And I don't think the rumours are too bad. Better than people thinking you're dating that tool Hiwatari.' He started playing with a strand of my hair but I slapped his hand away angrily.

'I am not dating Kai, or you for that matter. Stop these rumours right now' my eyes were full of hatred and I was ready to take a swing at the arrogant teen.

He sighed and smiled at me like I was incapable of making my own decisions. It was a pitying smile. He pitied me. A quiet growl left my lips as I fought the urge to pummel him; I could feel my eyes twitching and my fists shaking. He didn't have the right to look at me like that, he doesn't know anything about me. My teeth were clamped together as I walked towards the library, ignoring the redhead calling out my name.

I found an empty table and sat down with my head nestled in my arms; feeling angry and helpless. It didn't make sense; people have said worse so why is this guy getting to me? I shouldn't feel like this, why am I getting so worked up over some silly rumours? My insides were all twisted in knots and I struggled to calm myself, tears threatening to fall. I couldn't cry, not here. Classes are started in 15 minutes and I needed to compose myself, no-one can see me like this. Not in this state.

A quiet voice spoke in my ear, 'are you okay?'

I breathed out heavily and sat up, looking at the blue haired girl looking concerned.

'Yeah, just a little stressed.' I whispered, smiling.

'You should know by now that I am the master of fake smiles and I know that you are faking it right now. Don't get stressed over something as stupid as this, it's not good for you.'

I looked at her curiously, trying to figure out if she knew something, 'What do you mean?'

'Stress can cause either depression or manic episodes. You should know that by now.'

I furrowed my brows. 'How do you know?'

'That you're bipolar? I got it out of Kai, you know, blackmail.' She winked at me, smiling, before realising something. 'It is alright if I know. I think Kai figured it was okay otherwise he never would have told me, even if I blackmailed him.'

'It's fine. Saves me from telling you. Just… don't spread it around. I don't want everyone to know; two people are enough.

She nodded before turning to look at the clock. Her mouth opened and closed again. It looked like she wanted to say something but was holding back. She probably wanted to ask what it was like.

The bell rang and we both sighed getting up to go to our next class.

…

This day has been way too long. I really need the weekend to arrive quickly, I can't wait another day. Why can't we just get rid of Friday's? Or better yet, Mondays. But then Tuesdays will become Mondays. This was all too confusing and my mind is too worn around to think about this stuff.

I reached into my pocket to get my key out but noticed that the door to my apartment was already unlocked. I slowly pushed the door and slid through, not wanted to alert any possible intruders. The kitchen was right next to me which was lucky as I grabbed a knife from the drawer and crept into the living room. My bedroom door suddenly opened and I got ready to stab whoever was coming out before recognising the lanky person with messy blonde hair and brilliant blue eyes. I let out a relieved breath and glared at the idiot coming out of my room.

He noticed me giving him a dirty look and then saw the knife in my hand which caused him to double over in laughter. He is the only person who can get away with doing the most stupid things because I just find his laughter so enchanting. The corner of his eyes crinkle up and the sound that is produced is a rich melody which fills the whole room.

I couldn't help smiling a little. 'Ash, you moron'.

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	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you for reviewing! Enjoy dudes!**

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 9**

'Well, I just couldn't wait to see you. So I hopped on the next plane here.' Ash smiled at me goofily.

My best friend just came from England on a whim to see me and to be honest, I am elated. We've known each other since I was three years old and he was five so that was around… fifteen years ago. He's seen me at my highest, lowest and 'normal' stages.

'How's Kazuma?', I couldn't stop smiling like a moron.

'He's fine. Really stressed though because of work and stuff. I told him I was going to visit you and he told me to wait til the holidays so he could take a break and visit too but I couldn't wait. Anyway, let's bust open a box of chocolates and catch up dudette', he looked around the apartment for places where I might put chocolate before looking at me with his puppy dog eyes.

I sighed in fake annoyance and got up to find the tin of chocolates I bought last week. Ash switched the TV on and stopped on an episode of FRIENDS. That was one of the shows we used to watch together; every weekend we'd be glued to the illuminated screen for hours on end laughing at the six adults go about their daily lives. I guess I'm in a reminiscent mood; you really appreciate these moments when you don't experience them anymore.

'So have you got a new therapist yet?' he asked while shoving chocolate in his mouth. 'You said you wanted to find one right? And Kaz thinks you should get one too'.

'I've been meaning to but I just feel so lazy on the weekends.' I twirled the now melted blob in my fingers absentmindedly.

'How about we go on Saturday? You have school tomorrow right? Well I'll pick you up from there and we can go do something, then on Saturday we'll find someone, whoever you like.'

I smiled at him. He always knew how to help me and I was grateful for his support but sometimes I felt as if I was leaning on him too much. It happened before, with Conrad. He supported me too much so when he died, I was left with nothing. I have to make sure I'm strong enough on my own, but I guess accepting help sometimes isn't too bad.

We spent the rest of the evening laughing about various things; our lives now, the past and the future.

'Ash, I'm gonna sleep now, I'm really tired.' I yawned.

'Alright, I'm quite sleepy as well. The flight was really long and I was sat next to this old woman with no teeth who kept smiling at me weirdly. I was scared to fall asleep.' He smirked at me.

Ever since we were kids we slept in the same bed during sleepovers so there was no agreement over our sleeping arrangements. The only thing that changed was we slept head to toe. That was an order from Kaz because around three years ago we were play fighting and I accidently pushed Ash really hard and he broke his arm after hitting the floor. Apparently it's just safer sleeping head to toe.

We settled in and I could hear Ash breathing slowing down. I followed it, breath in… and out. Soon I drifted off into a comfortable sleep.

…

I stared at the gloop in my tray trying to figure out what the hell it was. Because I was in a rush this morning, I forgot to buy a sandwich and save myself from this puking inducing food. I sighed, my stomach rumbling, begging me to put something in it.

'Don't have a sandwich today?' Katrina came and sat next to me.

I shook my head and started day dreaming. Me, Katrina and Kai had become a little unit; dysfunctional and weird but still a unit. It felt kinda nice having someone to talk to or even sit with. I didn't know I craved human contact this much and to be honest, I thought I didn't need it. Guess I was wrong.

Kai joined us a little while later; holding a sandwich. I glared at the fluffy slices of bread with the delicious looking filling; cursing myself for forgetting to buy one.

Katrina noticed my expression and laughed. 'You really want a sandwich, don't you?'

Kai smirked and slowly started to unwrap the delicious meal. His index finger ran along the top of the sandwich as he raised it to his mouth, keeping eye contact with me. I held my breath, what he was doing was kind of… erotic, in a creepy sandwich eating way. He finally bit into it and I let out a breath, feeling a little annoyed and hungry.

'Any plans for the weekend?', Kai said, trying to divert my attention from his sandwich.

Katrina snorted and smiled to herself coldly before putting on a flat expression and staring at her food. I glanced at Kai, looking a little confused as to what could be bothering the girl. I was met with the same expression.

'You okay?' I asked hesitantly.

She looked up, 'yeah, just… nothing.'

We all went back to our food, sitting in awkward silence. The chatter of teens filled the cafeteria. I looked round absentmindedly and a certain redhead caught my eye. He was staring at me and when I locked eyes with him, he winked and began talking to his companion. I raised an eyebrow and growled internally.

'I'm sorry. I just made it really weird,' Katrina apologised. 'It's just that I don't really do much on the weekends. I have nowhere to go which means I end up stuck at home with… my dad.'

'Well, one of my friends from England is here and we were going to spend the weekend together just relaxing. You should join us for the whole weekend. It'll be fun.' I smiled at her. Feeling alone was the worst thing anyone could experience. I'm sure she wouldn't mind hanging out with Ash, he's a likeable person.

'No it's okay. You too probably want to catch up and stuff.' She looked a little unsure.

'It's fine. I really want you too. We are going out tonight somewhere, have no idea where but you could come to mine at around 8 and stay until Monday morning.'

'Ahem', Kai cleared his throat a little loudly, wanting to make himself known. 'What about me?'

I just looked at him. 'What about you?'

He rolled his eyes, 'I'm not doing anything this weekend'.

I smiled internally wanting to make this harder for him. 'Nice to know.' I turned back to Katrina and winked at her while Kai sat with his mouth gaping next to me.

He turned to around to face him. 'Alright smart ass, I want in on whatever you're doing on Saturday.'

I put a hand on my chin, pretending to be deep in thought. 'Saturday… Saturday… let me think.' I clicked my fingers and gave him my brightest smile, 'lesbian sex.'

Katrina choked on her drink while Kai looked a little shocked but quickly composed himself. 'Excellent. I'll be happy to join you', he smirked.

I rolled my eyes and smacked him over the head as I did quite a lot these days. 'Alright, you can join us on Saturday. But why don't you just stay over for the weekend like Kat?'

'I'm sure I won't be welcome.'

I was a little confused as to what he meant and was going to ask before the bell rang for the end of lunch.

…

I stretched my arms over my head as I left the school doors. The afternoon had been long and I wanted some time to relax and wind down with Ash. I had never spent the weekend with Katrina which might also be interesting. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turned to see the person who I was thinking about accompanied by the tall bluenette.

'You never told me where you live,' the blur haired girl said.

A car suddenly started beeping and we all looked around for the culprit. A brand new white Lamborghini Murcielago (such a lovely car) was parked right outside the school while teens all around stared at it in awe. The door opened and the lanky blonde boy stepped out.

I glared at him in disbelief. He wore the most childish smile and was obviously enjoying the attention from the females surrounding him. I groaned loudly. Ash had always been an attention seeker and due to his good looks, was always popular with the girls.

'What a prick' Katrina commented behind me, staring at the boy. I froze and suddenly had the urge to laugh; this was who she would be spending the weekend with.

Ash saw me standing on the steps and strode towards me, pushing aside the girls surrounding him. He finally reached me and before he could say anything I grabbed him by the ear, 'Didn't your mother ever teach you not to show off?'

'Ow, ow , ow, let go!' he whined loudly. I released his ear and turned to Katrina who looked a little perplexed.

'I live in the apartment in front of Edna's diner, room 6b.' I answered her earlier question.

'Um, who's this?' she looked shell shocked which made me snort a little.

'This is Ash. My friend from England, unfortunately we've known each other since we were munchkins and he never left me alone since.' I smirked at the blonde boy rolling his eyes at me.

'Yeah whatever' he replied smiling before flicking my forehead. He suddenly bear hugged me, 'you know you love me.'

'Ash… can't breathe here' I was being squeezed to death.

He let go and finally turned his attention to the two teens stood in front of me. 'You must be her friends!', he bounced up to both of them and shook their hands excitedly.

I smiled at his childish behaviour; he was still the same as he was five years ago. It's like he never aged.

Ash was talking to Katrina enthusiastically about God knows what while Kai shuffled closer to me. 'You never said your friend was a guy'.

He looked at Ash cautiously, as if the blonde boy was going to murder the girl he was speaking to. I rolled me eyes, 'it's Ash. He's like a… puppy. Very innocent-' I paused before adding, 'well, kind of.'

'What do you mean kind of?' the bluenette worriedly asked.

'Pfft, it's nothing. He just likes girls a lot is all. You know, he's a bit of a sex fiend'. I explained casually.

Kai suddenly looked more worried than before.

'Don't worry. He respects me, he'd never try anything. Even if he did, that would be kind of incestuous'. I tried to ease the teen next to me.

'You're related?' he asked.

'No'

'Then how is it incest?'

'Just is.' I felt the urge to laugh at the freaked out expression on his face. 'We're like siblings so it's like incest.'

Ash appeared next to me. 'We have to go or we'll be late for dinner reservations.'

'Dinner reservations' I asked.

'Yup! I reserved a table at Taco Bell' he beamed at me.

'… I don't think Taco Bell is the kind of place where you can reserve a table.' I replied a little unsurely.

'Well I did!' he looked so pleased with himself.

I smiled at him. 'Alright then, let's go. Bye guys, see you later Kat.'

I smirked to myself; this weekend should be interesting.

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	10. Chapter 10

**It's been too long, I know! I'm sorry guys but college is a biatch; ruining my life :(**

**Enjoy anyway :P**

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 10**

'Would you rather… live in a house with no internet, or no indoor plumbing?' I smiled evilly at the two teens sitting lazily in my living room.

Dinner had been fun; I always enjoyed spending time with Ash and the fact that he actually managed to reserve a table at Taco Bell was an added bonus. Katrina joined us a little while after we got home and we ended up playing 'would you rather' whilst eating a large tub of ice cream each. All in all, it's been an awesome Friday.

'What kind of a monster are you? Who even suggests living without internet?' Katrina ranted loudly.

Ash snorted, 'I'm guessing you'd live without indoor plumbing then. I'd probably pick the same. I need my daily dose of porn.' He winked at us before having two pillows hit him square in the face.

Katrina glanced at me and rolled her eyes.

'Idiot', we both said in unison.

'Well ladies, I'd love to stay and chat all night, but I need my beauty sleep. See you tomorrow' Ash yawned and sauntered off to my room.

'Night' we both replied.

The living room suddenly felt empty; the life of the party was gone and there were only two socially awkward people left. Fun.

I couldn't help but smile a little at the quiet atmosphere. I glanced over at Kat who was looking at me nervously, also thinking about the awkwardness in the room.

'It's weird being at someone's house.' She broke the silence. 'I never get invited anywhere so I was really nervous about what the… _rules _are and stuff, you know, sleepover protocol. When you said you wanted me to come… I was… well… you know… basically thanks for inviting me. It means a lot.' Her voice quietened down at the end to a whisper.

I studied her expression. She was looking at her hands, a small smile on her face and her eyes were starting to fill up.

'Hey hey, it's okay. Honestly, it's fun having you around. I'm really lonely here, especially when Ash isn't here so you can come and stay over anytime.' I put my hand over hers and smiled warmly at her.

This feels so weird. I thought I would just walk through these two years without getting attached to anyone. That way, it'll be easier to leave after school is finished but now, I think I can actually stay here and like it. Maybe even live here in the future.

I brushed that final thought off. I couldn't stay here, I needed to go back home; to Kaz, Ash and… Conrad. I couldn't leave Conrad. Even though he's not… _here_ anymore, I still need him.

I could feel my heart become heavier and heavier; I breathed deeply to calm myself and put on my usual fake smile. 'So, which film should we watch?'

…

'RISE AND SHINE PEOPLE! THE BIRDS ARE SINGING, THE SUN IS OUT, IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY! LET'S GO!' Ash's voice bellowed through the living room where me and Katrina were sprawled out across the floor.

A sharp light hit my eyes as I saw the teen opening the blinds. I groaned loudly, 'no energy'.

'It's 12 Fifi, we need to meet your boyfriend at the park.'

I heard Katrina laugh from her side of the floor and stuck my leg out to kick her. 'He's not my boyfriend.'

'Well then your _friend_ with benefits is waiting.' Ash smirked.

I glared at him and pulled myself up using the couch. 'Shut up,' was all I could manage this early in the morning.

He laughed at my weak response.

'Stupid jerk', I muttered under my breath all the way to the bathroom.

…

We sat on the bench in the park, Katrina yawning next to me while Ash was gawking at the women who walked past. I leaned back and stared at the sky.

'He's so late' I said flatly. 'I'm gonna kill him.'

'Maybe he forgot. Ring him and ask.' Ash suggested, diverting his attention from a particular female's behind.

'It's Kai. He never forgets things.' Katrina added. She turned to me, 'you have his number?'

'Yeah', I replied, a little unsure as to what her reaction would be. 'Why?'

'Nothing. I just don't remember him giving you his number'.

I sighed and started tapping my feet on the ground; I was becoming more and more irritated by the minute. He was an hour late and we were still waiting for him.

'Alright, he's not gonna show. Let's just go. He'll ring us if he gets here so it's no problem.' Ash finally became impatient. 'I am bored, so let's just go.'

For some reason, I didn't want to leave; he might show up. 'I think I'm going to stay here for a little while longer. In case he shows up.'

'Alright, suit yourself.' Ash sighed and started walking away, Katrina following him.

I sat on the bench for ten more minutes before getting annoyed and deciding to find his house. I know he's rich, well his Granddad is anyway. He probably lives in the rich part of town, in the biggest mansion.

I suddenly had a brainwave. He's famous in this town so I can just ask anyone where he lives and they'll know. I looked around the park, searching for a possible victim to ask. My eye caught a man with a young boy playing catch on the grass together; the image just seemed so normal and natural. Even though I never had that, I've always known that it's normal to have a caring family instead of one that hates you.

'Excuse me Miss, are you okay?' the young boy looked up at me curiously with large blue eyes. 'You seem a little sad. Did someone hurt you?'

I smiled kindly at the young child and bent down so I was at the same level as him. 'No, I'm okay. I was just thinking about my dad. Can I ask you something?'

He nodded.

'Do you know the house where the Hiwatari's live?' my voice was syrupy sweet; it always changed when I talk to kids.

'Yup! They live in a huge house. I saw it once! There was a big fountain and the grass outside was so green. It would be so cool to live there, don't you think Miss? And I bet they have a huge TV inside and candyfloss! And maybe –'the boy babbled on excitedly; he had a very good imagination.

I chucked, 'do you know the address or the street?'

'The street is called Ester Heights. The richest people live there. I wanna live there one day when I'm famous' his eyes sparkled and I was astounded at how optimistic he was. I was also a little disappointed; he would soon become older and realise that the world isn't all that nice. He would probably lose that glint in his eyes and become a monotonous human being; or maybe he'll be one of those rare happy people you find occasionally.

I patted him on the head, 'remember something. Stay happy, okay?'

'Okay Miss. You too!' he beamed at me. 'Keep smiling! My mum always tells me that'.

My smile left my face as he mentioned his mother and I remembered mine. She would never have told me anything like that; to keep happy or keep smiling. I was a little jealous of the boy; his father was alive while his mother cared, hopefully he'd turn out to be a good kid.

I shook my head and focussed on finding the apparently huge house.

…

No exaggeration. It was a frigging palace. The kid was right about the grass and the fountain but the building itself was huge. I felt a little apprehensive pressing the buzzer on the gate outside. This felt so weird. The intercom suddenly crackled, 'Hiwatari residence, who is this?'

'Erm, I'm Felicity Phoenix. I was wondering if Kai was in.'

'Master Kai is not expecting you. You may come in and wait in the foyer until he is informed' the posh voice replied from the machine.

The gate suddenly swung open and walked in toward the colossal building. The door of the mansion was opened by a fairly elderly gentleman wearing a suit with a black bowtie. He must be the butler looking at the way he stood; his back was straight and his shoulders pulled back. I peered inside. Words cannot describe the brilliance of the foyer. There was a large crystal chandelier hanging from the ceiling in the centre and that was the main attraction of the room. Each individual crystal was cut perfectly so the light reflected off it beautifully. The paintings on the wall were done by top class professionals and some of them were famous pieces worth millions of dollars. Two staircases started at each side of the room and met on the first floor in the middle. The floor was made up of strange transparent tiles and underneath those were small streams of water which could be seen running.

My mind was officially blown. This guy wasn't just rich, he was _rich_ rich.

'What are you doing here?' a deep voice called out from the top of the staircase.

I jumped and looked up to see Kai peering down at me. I was still in awe of the house but had to make myself look angry.

'Well, you were meant to meet us at the park like 2 hours ago. Why the hell didn't you show up?' I snapped at him weakly.

He raised an eyebrow, 'I was busy'.

'Excuse me? You were busy? Then a phone call or even a text message would have been nice. We were waiting for more than an hour.' My voice was getting louder and louder.

'I forgot' he replied simply, without much emotion.

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion; this wasn't like him. Something must have happened. 'Can I stay for a while?' I asked, a little more calmly than before. 'Ash and Kat have already gone and I don't have much to do.'

He shrugged and motioned for me to come upstairs. I sighed and followed him into his room, which was also huge. It was the same size as my apartment and the one next door put together. The walls were a light grey and a little plain which could be said for the whole room; it had no personality.

'So…' I broke the awkward silence. This had never been a problem for us before. 'Are you okay?'

'Yeah', he replied without smiling.

There was definitely something wrong; he was never this cold towards me. My mind became foggy and started spinning. Maybe it's my fault. What if I did something or said something that offended him. He was my first friend here, I don't want to lose him but then again, I didn't deserve a friend in the first place. I should just be left to rot on my own. My arms felt numb as these poisonous thoughts rushed through my mind and my legs felt like they were made of jelly. I had the sudden urge to throw up but I held it down, not wanting to embarrass myself.

He felt a hand on my arm. I was being lead to the edge of a bed and was gently pushed so I was sitting down on the bouncy mattress.

Suddenly my vision was filled with crimson eyes; there was no sparkle in them, just seriousness and anger. A lock of my hair fell on to my face but was immediately pushed back by long, masculine fingers; two of them lingered on my temple and began moving in a circular motion.

We both stared at each other while his fingers were still rubbing the side of my forehead; my mind began to clear a little and I forgot the negative thoughts I was having previously. His eyes had me in a trance and gaze kept flitting to his mouth. I could feel my heart beating rapidly and it was scaring me.

There was a sharp knock on the door and I breathed a sigh of relief.

'Master Kai, would your guest like to stay for lunch? I can have something prepared.' The butler asked, oblivious to my grateful expression.

'Yes Andrei. Thank you' Kai replied.

The butler nodded and closed the door as he left. The same awkwardness was back in the room. Kai had his back turned to me so I couldn't see his expression but I was feeling nervous. This wasn't supposed to happen, I wanted to kiss him.

I cried internally at that thought. I had to keep my attachment at a minimum so I could leave quickly without teary goodbyes and what not.

'Video game?' he suggested whilst turning around.

'Uh, sure', he handed me a console and we sat next to each other, shoulders touching. My mind kept going back to his intense gaze; my poor character was being beaten to death but I was too dazed to care. Things just got a little difficult.

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**What do you guys think? I wanted to get the romance thing moving a little, things are about to get interesting hehe**

**REVIEW! **


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry if there are any mistakes or anything, didn't have time to check it, I am drowning in work at the mo :(**

**Enjoy :P**

**I don't own Beyblade**

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**Chapter 11**

I twirled my fork around the strange food in my plate, too scared to taste it. I looked up to see Kai already digging in.

'Erm, what is this?' I asked, faking nonchalance.

He smirked at me, obviously enjoying my discomfort. 'Huitlacoche'.

My face twisted into a confused expression, 'huh?'

He sighed, 'corn fungus'.

'…'

'What?' he said.

'…' I opened my mouth to say something but closed it again promptly.

He rolled his eyes and went back to his food while I sat there staring it. 'It looks like it's going to eat me', I said cautiously, not taking my eyes off the… stuff.

He didn't reply or make a sarcastic comment; which made me even more worried. 'What's wrong' I asked seriously.

He glared at me for a while before going back to eating. I looked at him in disbelief; the idiot wasn't going to tell me.

'Fine'. I stood up and tucked my chair under the table for grabbing my things and leaving. He didn't try to stop me.

…

He was fine on Monday; back to his normal self so I didn't pry. Ash went back home to England and Kat was brooding for some reason; personally, I think it's because Ash left. I chuckled to myself, poor girl falling for the idiotic playboy, ah well, she'll get over him. It's not like you can fall in love after a day.

A couple of months passed normally; sitting at the 'loner' table everyday with Kat and Kai making fun of everyone else. Tala and his crew never really left us alone. I'm guessing their mission is to make our lives living hell but we fight back. There was an incident with glue and Katrina's hair which ended surprisingly well. She had it cut so it was fairly short but her fringe was long and dramatic, sweeping down the side of her face; it looked edgy and really suited her. Nearly everyone stopped in the hallways to looks at her new style which screamed badass chick.

As well as the war with the drones, my workload and increased a lot. Teachers suddenly started giving more than an hour's worth of work each night and it was getting stressful. I guess they thought we needed a lot of practice to pass the exams, or maybe they just wanted to see us suffer – I'm thinking it's the latter.

My sleep pattern was disrupted badly; I spent a lot of nights staying awake to complete essays and other work and during the day I was a walking zombie. Kai and Kat didn't think it was that bad, they seemed to finish the work and have free time afterwards as well. My life was in a slump and was just about to get a whole lot worse.

…

'That's all for today. Don't forget, I want 2000 words on the different types of bonding for tomorrow.' Mr Whitlock reminded us.

I sighed. He only gave us two days to do it and I hadn't even started because of the maths papers we had been given to complete for today. On top of that I could see Tala and his gang waiting outside the classroom.

'Hey Fifi, how's it going?' Tala smiled charmingly at me, 'you seem a little stressed', his smirk got wider.

I shot daggers at him and walked off towards to toilets. I stared at myself in the mirror; my hair was looking dull and messy while my eyes had huge bags under them.

While I was inspecting my monstrous appearance, the door of a cubicle swung open and out came Emily. She glanced absentmindedly at me before doing a double take.

'You look terrible', she commented in her monotonous tone. 'There are many vitamins you can take or just improve you sleep habits. You could go to-'

'Thanks but no thanks. I can deal', I retorted before walking out. She kinda freaked me out, her robotic voice and the fact that she was helping me even though I'm sure she has strict orders to make my life hell.

Speaking of hell, my next lesson was physics and I am sure we would be getting a ton of homework from Miss King; not looking forward to that.

…

'Okay, so if the distance is 2m, then the speed should be 6m/s', I muttered to myself.

It was 2am and I was sitting at my desk at home trying to finish the physics work. I only got 2 hours sleep yesterday so I was ready to collapse but I knew this was important; I just had to complete it. I forced myself to get up and scour the kitchen for some kind of energy drink to keep me awake but alas, I found nothing. I decided to go out to the shops, buy a drink and have a little bit of a break as well.

The air outside was cold and crisp; it felt fresh on my face. It was completely dark outside and there was no sign of anyone outside. The diner was closed and the car park empty which was strange to see as it was always full.

My walk to the shop took 15 minutes and when I got back I felt slightly more refreshed. My mind was a little more awake and I could focus on the problem in front of me. I felt confident I could finish it in time for tomorrow and get a good grade which made me smile like a kid. My feet were tapping repeatedly against the floor and my fingers couldn't stop moving. I laughed at my limbs; it looked like they were doing some weird dance.

I suddenly had a brainwave about the last question and I rushed to scribble everything down. My handwriting was messy and half of the words couldn't be read but I was sure the teacher would be able to.

I sat back in my chair and looked up at the ceiling. There was a pattern on it that looked like an elephant. I grabbed my paint and stood on the chair, wanting to make the elephant colourful. I brushed the ceiling frantically, not pausing for a second. The chair I was standing on was shifting from side to side due to my rapid movements but I didn't notice.

My mind felt more awake than it had done in a long time. I felt good, like I could do anything. I had the sudden need to talk to Kai so I instantly dropped my paint and brush on the floor leaving a huge stain on the carpet. I grabbed my phone and rang him whilst walking around the apartment continuously. I remembered that it was late and he might be sleeping and when I was about to put the phone down, a voice answered on the other end.

'Hello', it was groggy and irritated.

'Hey dude! How's it hanging? There was an elephant on my ceiling so I painted it and it looks so awesome but then I walked around the apartment and I rang you but you were sleeping but now you're awake so it's okay and there was show on like two years ago in England about a cowboy who stole loads of things from some bar in Mexico or something and I thought it would be so cool if I was a cowboy or cowgirl. Man… men are so sexist, why is everything cowboy, why not girl, why-'

'Felicity, Felicity, OI, shut up' he yelled down the phone. 'Just stop talking for a minute okay? You are making no sense and we have school tomorrow so you can tell me about your feminist issues then. Goodnight.'

He hung up and I stood there staring at it. I can't believe he hung up, was an idiot! Why is he so mean to me? One minute he's all like, 'I'm going to be nice to you' and then he's like 'let's just hang up the phone'. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

…

'Maybe I should just skip school today. I could go shopping instead! That sounds so much better. But I need to yell at Kai for hanging up on me.' I sang loudly in my apartment.

I was 8am and the time for school was looming but I honestly did not want to go. I groaned and ran into the bathroom to get ready.

While I was brushing my teeth I saw my pills sitting on the sink and without thinking, I picked up the bottle and emptied it into the toilet. I didn't really need them anyway. Everything just wants me to have them because they don't want me to be happy like I am now. They want me to stay depressed but I'm free now and I can be as happy as I want.

I beamed at my reflection and danced my way into my bedroom. I rummaged through my closet and emerged with a black corset-top with no straps and some tight, black leather shorts. I ran my fingers through my hair and backcombed to add volume after which I applied some thick eyeliner and bright red lipstick. All in all, I looked like slut, and I felt good.

…

As soon as I walked through the main doors all eyes were on me and I was loving it. The girls were green while the guys developed problems in their pants; some of them rushed into the bathroom to take care of it before anyone saw while others didn't care and just stared with their mouths open. Poor saps.

I walked to my locker and saw Kai standing in front of it with his mouth agape like everyone else. He looked confused and slightly scared which made me chuckle. I gave him a flirty smile before winking and opening my locker.

'What-' his voice came out all squeaky before he cleared his throat and started again. 'What are you wearing?'

I turned towards him and moved in closer to whisper in his ear. 'Wouldn't you like to see what I'm not wearing?'

He tensed suddenly and looked at me with his beautiful eyes, open wide.

I planted a kiss on his cheek before strutting to my chemistry lesson.

…

I fidgeted that whole lesson and also put my hand up for all of the questions even though that was out of the norm for me. Mr Whitlock was visibly sweating and he kept looking over at me and I replied by raising my eyebrow and smiling.

When the lesson ended he told me to stay back because he wanted to discuss my 'essay', I scoffed to myself.

'Well, you did a great job with it and you were very erm, very active in today's lesson.'

I put my hand on his arm and we locked eyes. I had to admit he was very good looking and I wanted him as much as he wanted me. Looking back at it, I know I wasn't at my _sanest_ so I can't be blamed for what happened between us.

His hand moved to my cheek while his other one pushed me back on the desk harshly so I was staring at the ceiling. He climbed on top of me and planted his lips on mine.

The whole thing was rough, we didn't stop for air, we didn't think about how the other person felt. There was no love or compassion, it was just sex; and I wanted more.

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**In case it wasn't obvious, she is having a manic episode, she didn't just turn slutty all of a sudden :P**

**Please REVIEW! Tell me what you think dudes!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I am so so so so so so so soooo sorry! My workload has gone sky high since January exams have been getting closer and I am literally dying. It took me like two weeks to write this chapter even though it is shorter than the others. Waay shorter. I am sorry :( it ain't my best either in my opinion. I'll let you read it now :P**

**I don't own Beyblade (if I did, I wouldn't be revising)**

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**Chapter 12**

The hallways were empty when I left the classroom. I headed to the toilets to fix my hair, keeping up appearances is important, especially if I want to pull again. I work hard all the time so I deserve to have a little fun. Speaking of fun, I haven't talked to Ash in a while; I wonder how he's doing. I scrambled around in my bag searching for my phone.

'Hey Ash, guess what? I painted an elephant in my room and it's really nice and colourful. Oh! And I figured out what I want to do in the future! I am going to travel the world, like England and Africa and Antarctica and Australia and did you know that I have really big muscles? So I can walk and walk and walk for ages-' I was cut off by Ash.

'Hey, Fifi!', his voice sounded panicky, 'I want you to listen very carefully okay? You are manic right now so I need you to go to the Emergency Department in hospital, okay? Or wait, is there a friend close by?'

'Nooope I'm in the toilets. And I am not manic, I'm just having a little fun. I work and work and work but nothing comes out of it so I'm just going to enjoy myself from now on. I feel great, seriously. You know those horrible pills the doc gave me make me feel sad. I can't believe they give them out on purpose.' I complained while Ash was trying to get me to shut up.

'Find Kai right now', he demanded.

I rolled my eyes at the phone and decided to listen to him. Ash was still on the other end as I roamed the hallways looking for Kai.

'Well, someone's looking happy today', Tala appeared round the corner. 'You on happy pills or something?'

'I was on sad pills but I threw them away and now I am feeling goooood', I twirled around in a circle but stopped when I heard Ash yelling on the phone. 'Alright alright blondie, chill I'll find Kai' I yelled back at him.

'Pssht, men.' I said to no-one in particular.

Tala looked at me with a strange expression on his face; it was a mix of confusion, worry and surprise.

'Are you… crazy?' he looked at me in disbelief.

I snorted, 'no. Everyone says that but screw them, they don't know everything. I have to find Kai or Ash will get mad. Bye bye!' I cheerfully danced around him and continued down the hallway.

…

'Take her to the emergency department and they will decide what to do with her. She's only hypomanic at the moment, not full blown mania as far as I can tell so you still have some time to take her. It'll be much harder if she's fully manic.' Ash explained to Kai over the phone.

It took me twenty minutes to find him with Ash shouting at me and telling me to hurry up. He was in a physics lesson which I interrupted and dragged him out. The teacher didn't look too happy but hey, who cares. Physics sucks anyway.

I stood behind Kai and put my arms around his neck while Ash talked to him. I rested my chin on his shoulder and started humming a random tune while tapping my feet repeatedly on the ground. He smelled really nice; like peppermint. I ran my nose along his neck, inhaling the fresh scent while he struggled to keep himself upright with my show of affection and talk on the phone at the same time.

I moved my hands from his neck to his waist and began placing light kisses near the back of his jawline. He instantly turned around and grabbed my hands to stop me from continuing. His eyes were dark and his face was serious. I looked at him with crocodile tears in my eyes after which his expression softened and he placed his hand on my head.

'Will do. I'll talk to you later then', he shut off the phone and gave it back to me. 'Time to go'.

'Where we going?' I asked him playfully. 'Let's go to your house. We can have some fun', I winked at him suggestively.

He turned away from me, a determined look on his face. I grabbed his hand and placed my head on his shoulder. He didn't shrug me away and I stayed like that until we got to his motorbike.

…

'She lives on her own', Kai told the doctor while I sat on the bed and played with all of the instruments in the room.

'I think it is best if she is admitted into hospital. She has a history of severe manic episodes so it would be wise to prevent her from potentially harming herself or others in the future.' the doctor explained to Kai.

He merely nodded in response.

'Okay Miss Phoenix. I am admitting you into hospital because there is a chance that your manic episode could get out of hand and we are here to keep that under control. Do you understand?' The doctor said.

I looked at him angrily, 'There is nothing wrong with me! Don't you idiots understand? You just don't want me to be happy. I hate you! I hate all of you!' I screeched loudly with reaching out for an instrument to use on the doctor.

Two nurses suddenly appeared and tried to calm me down while Kai was forced out of the room in case things turned sour. I screamed and thrashed around while they tried to hold me down which wasn't very successful.

After half an hour of fighting with the nurses, I eventually calmed down and was led away to my room in the hospital. Kai was told to collect some of my belongings from my apartment and bring them back here so that my stay could be as comfortable as possible.

…

Mania is the flipside of depression. So it's basically when you have a seemingly endless amount of energy; so much that you can't think straight. Your thoughts are all muddled up and the words that come out of your mouth can't catch up to your thoughts so nothing makes sense. Sleep also becomes less important and another symptom is hypersexuality where the person engages in numerous sexual activities without thinking about the consequences. Hypomania is the less serious version; before going into a full blown manic episode, people will usually be in a hypomanic state for a while. The time of each episode depends on the person.

I remember my worst manic episode, well, I remember what I've been told about it. There are blank spots during that time where I have no idea what was going on. I started having hallucinations which I remember vividly. I saw Conrad everywhere I went even though he was dead. My thoughts rushed around so fast that it hurt just to think. Nothing was going right; no-one could understand what I wanted because I couldn't get it out. After that episode I promised myself I would never let that happen again, I couldn't let it happen again. It was like being chained in your own mind, you have no control. I told myself I would take care of my mental state and I did for a long time.

This time though, I let it slip. I was too comfortable with my surroundings. I wasn't alert enough and this is what happened. I needed to find a way to live with this illness; I needed time to compose myself forever. I needed… to find a way to just deal.

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	13. Chapter 13

**Here you go guys :) Thank you for reviewing :D **

**I don't own Beyblade :(**

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**Chapter 13**

**Katrina POV**

Two months had gone by since Felicity was first admitted into hospital and her progress has… fluctuated. Kai visited her basically every day; I think he only missed two while I visited her around three or four times a week. Sometimes she would be quite normal, sitting with the other residents or talking to you like she did before but then the next minute she'd be bounding off the walls and speaking nonsense. She has improved a lot though. Her outbursts aren't as frequent and she has a better awareness of what is going on.

She looks tired though, like she hasn't slept in weeks. Her eyes have lost their shine; she used to have a cunning glint to them but they look… dead. It makes me shiver thinking about how much she suffered in the past and how much she is suffering now. I have a basic idea of what happened but I don't know all of the details. I guess I'm just waiting for her to tell me when she is comfortable.

**Normal POV**

Living in a mental hospital is interesting to say the least. There are so many people around you that are in pain and have these problems but these same people can do things that normal people might not be able to.

There is a fairly young girl here, around 19 years old, and she is amazing at maths. You could give her any code to decipher and she will do it in mere minutes. I was thinking of employing her and hacking into some large organisation to steal some top secret files. We could use them for blackmail and then split the money. It's a great idea however I don't think she will be getting out anytime soon and the hospital wouldn't appreciate us hacking under their supervision.

It is quite a comfortable atmosphere here except when one of the patients becomes agitated; it disrupts the normal routine.

Speaking of routine, Kai visited every single day at the same time. I think he only missed two days but he told me why a few weeks before. We talked when I was a little saner at the time, if not he just sat with me or read to me. There were times when he was asked to leave because I was flustered but he always came back the next day no matter what. Even though I don't remember some of his visits, I really appreciate what he did for me.

…

'The doctor said I can leave in two weeks which is really good.' I talked while twirling spaghetti around my fork.

Kai was sitting on the chair across from me while Katrina was sat on the window ledge. It was Saturday and they decided to pay me a visit together and bring me some books to read since the ones here are a little dry.

'That's great. So are you allowed to come back to school or are you staying at home for a while?', Kat asked. 'You know, there is the whole issue with stress and everything'.

'You should stay at home for a while', Kai looked at me seriously. 'It's best for you'.

I rolled my eyes and tried to supress a smile. They were worried about me; it was sweet and sickening at the same time. I wasn't used to this kind of treatment and it made me feel kinda queasy.

'I am meant to go to school but I'm not allowed to have short deadlines and stuff like that. If I feel stressed I have to tell my teachers. I guess major assignments are off the list. I just hope I'm sane enough to sit through final exams and do well. I want to finish this year and get the last one out of the way so I can leave', I sighed. I didn't want to get held back a year because I missed too much school because then I'd be here forever.

'Finals are a while away so you should be okay by then. Don't worry. Anyway, sorry but I have to scram. My dad was pissed at me for coming home late yesterday because I didn't have time to cook that sorry man dinner. I can't wait til I leave as well or I might end up killing that SOB (son of a b****)', Kat fumed while she collected her things I started to leave.

'See you later', I smiled, 'and thanks for coming'.

'I like coming here', she shrugged and left.

I gazed into my plate happy that I had friends who cared but a little unsure. I was planning on leaving after my senior year but they will make it harder for me to do that.

My thoughts were interrupted when Kai lay down on the bed next to me. He stared at the ceiling, his eyebrows furrowed while he focused on one spot. He hands were behind his head and his whole body was sprawled across the bed for me to see and ahem, admire. I guess there was no denying the attraction I felt towards him.

I took my index finger and touched his forehead right between his eyebrows. He snapped out of his trance and gazed up at me while I smiled back.

I suddenly remembered something to ask him, 'do you remember when we invited you ages ago to meet us in the park and you didn't show? What was up with you that day?'.

He studied my face for a while before focusing on the same spot on the ceiling again. 'My father was just lecturing me about the family business and what not. He was choosing universities for me and the course I was going to do, I just got mad, that's all'.

'I'm guessing telling him how you _feel _isn't going to help', I replied.

He snorted, 'as if he cares what I want.'

There was an awkward silence in the room and I regretted asking him.

'Sorry', I said lamely.

He sat up next to me and smiled sadly, 'no need.'

At that moment the nurse came in to give me my pills and I was grateful for the interruption.

'Here you go dear. And here's some water, 'she beamed at Kai. 'Would you like something to drink honey?'

'No thanks, I'm fine', he shook his head at the old nurse.

I gave the glass back to her and she turned to leave.

'You're so lucky having a lovely boyfriend who visits you every day. There are no proper lads these days, they are all getting drunk and acting indecent'. The nurse tutted and left the room, leaving an even more awkward atmosphere in the room.

I glanced at Kai out of the corner of my eye and saw his cheeks turning a little pink. I chuckled under my breath.

'So _boyfriend_,' I winked at him, 'how do you want to spend the rest of this boring day?'.

He rolled his eyes and smirked at me. 'I have a few ideas, _girlfriend_'.

'And here I thought you were a proper lad who didn't act indecently'.

He laughed while shifting so he ended up leaning against the wall. He patted the spot next to him and I moved so I was leaning into him. He put his arm around me and I could smell peppermint, his signature smell that I loved.

'We should celebrate when you get out of here', he said.

'Yeah, that'd be cool. All three of us could go to a restaurant or something and eat til we're sick'.

He paused awkwardly, 'what if just the two of us went?'.

I turned to look at him and was surprised to see him so close. My heart started beating faster than usual and I swallowed slowly.

'Erm… you mean like a umm…' I didn't finish my sentence.

'Yeah, a date'.

I laughed nervously but didn't say anything.

He sighed in disbelief and started hitting his head against the wall.

'You are the most frustrating person I have ever met, you know that?', he faked annoyance. 'You do know I like you right?'.

His cheeks turned pinker than before, 'this sounds so lame', he whispered to himself.

'Huh…', I paused, 'I never pegged you as being shy'. I smirked enjoying the obvious discomfort he was feeling.

Suddenly his hand cupped my chin as he looked at me determinedly, his crimson eyes hypnotising me. I was caught off guard as his finger started caressing my cheek and my insides turned to mush.

He smirked knowing full well what he was doing to me. 'The first Friday you get out of here we are going to have dinner, okay?' He stood up to leave while I tried to compose myself.

'Erm, what about Kat?', I mumbled under my breath, my cheeks a bright pink.

'She can wait,' and with that he left the room.

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	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks to the dudes who reviewed! It made my day :P And I hope you all had a Merry Christmas!**

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**Chapter 14**

'So you're finally getting out today, huh? Ash's voice resonated through the phone. 'Anything special planned? You usually spend the first night eating like a pig, right?'

I scowled at the phone, hoping Ash would feel my 'annoyed' vibes. I remembered Kai and the plans he made, without my permission might I add, not that I refused though.

'Actually, I erm…', I cleared my throat and mumbled, 'have a date.'

There was a short silence.

'What?', he replied flatly.

I sighed and shouted, 'I HAVE A DATE!'

Silence.

'With?' I could hear the surprise in Ash's voice. I hadn't been on a date in a long, long time; before… before Conrad died.

'Erm, Kai' I chuckled nervously.

'Huh… cool.' Ash said, obviously deep in thought about something. 'Well have fun okay. And if you need any advice just ask. And don't sleep with him on the first date... or second, or third. Just wait for a few months. Oh and-'

I rolled my eyes and smiled at his nervousness. 'Relax. You're acting like you're going on a date with him. I know what I'm doing okay, I'm sure it'll be fine. I don't need you to lecture me about sleeping with people Mr Playboy of the century. You sleep with girls before you even date them, I don't know how that's possible but you do.'

'Well I am a magical human being and am capable of doing the impossible,' he joked. 'Go, get ready for your date and have fun.'

'Thanks, talk to you later, bye'.

I turned the phone off and looked around the now empty hospital room. School was in session which is where Kai and Kat were. I wonder how things were like without me. I'm kinda looking forward to going back.

A nurse poked her head into the room and smiled, 'you ready sunshine?'

I smiled back at her, 'yup'.

…

The doorbell rang and I leapt out of the shower, my hair dripping wet. I was only wearing a large T-shirt which barely covered my bum; it was the first thing I saw and I panicked. Now walking towards the door I feel completely naked and wish I would have chosen something else.

I unlocked it and it swung open to reveal Kai, wearing a fairly formal crimson sweater and black jeans. He opened his mouth to say something before noticing what I was wearing, after which he shut it again. His eyes were glued to my thighs so he didn't notice the look of disgust on my face.

'OI, PERV! EYES ON THE FACE' I said sternly, glaring at him.

He snapped out of his daze but his intense eyes still wondered up and down my body which made my skin tingle with embarrassment and... something else. Pride for being able to make the great Kai speechless? Or was it pleasure? Whatever it was, it was beginning to make me feel queasy.

I growled and grabbed his arm, pulling him into my apartment. My other hand held on to the back of my t-shirt in case it revealed more than it already did.

'Sit. You are early, wait here.' I swiftly turned around, still holding on to my t-shirt. I could feel his dark eyes staring, making a hole in my back. I shut the door to my bedroom without looking back at him and sighed. My stomach was churning and my heart felt light. I shuddered and tried to concentrate on the task at hand; finding something nice to wear.

I perused my closet and found a summery white dress and a black biker jacket. I found some black, studded ankle boots at the bottom and decided they would go perfectly. I kept the makeup natural and I just left my hair to do whatever it wanted; there was no point in adding stuff to it, it never listens.

I realised how quiet it was outside; Kai isn't one to sit there without doing anything. I suddenly got really suspicious and went to see what he was up to. As soon as I opened the door, Kai jumped and shut the book he was holding. It was my photo album; I must have left it out earlier.

Poor boy looked so guilty, normally I would have tortured him but I was feeling especially nice today. I took the album off him and sat down on the sofa; he just stayed frozen on the spot.

'Come here doofus', I joked with him.

He laughed nervously before looking guilty again, 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry or anything.' He stood there with a light blush on his face and he was playing with his hands; he looked… cute.

His blue hair looked especially shiny today, unusually shiny. I suddenly realised something that I couldn't pass up. I couldn't keep the smirk off my face.

He noticed and looked confused, 'what?'

'Did you… use conditioner on your hair? Hmm… I didn't think you were the type', I said faking nonchalance.

His cheeks became redder, 'there's nothing wrong with that!', he replied defensively.

'I never said there was', the smirk just wouldn't leave my face.

'Are we going to go or not?', he said, trying to change the subject.

I grinned at him, 'whatever you say'.

'You look really nice by the way,' he commented, rather shyly. I guess he was just as nervous as I was.

…

The restaurant he took me to was one of those ridiculously expensive ones. The ceiling was in a dome shape with a huge chandelier in the middle and the wallpaper was quite majestic; the colours being golden and red. There were waiters at nearly every table on standby awaiting orders. The whole place seemed busy but peaceful at the same time.

Our waiter took us to the corner of the restaurant where it was a little more private. He handed us the menus and left us to decide.

I glanced at the options and came to the conclusion that I did not know what any of them were. I snuck a peek at Kai and saw him concentrating on the menu; he was obviously used to these places.

I looked around and noticed there were a lot of couples. There were a few business men here and the odd family but overall the number of lovers was more. This made me slightly more nervous than I already was. I had thought about starting a relationship with Kai but that all depending on if he wanted to be with me as well. He'd probably get bored of me after a while and leave me for someone happier or nicer or… saner. He is really good looking and smart; there are so many other girls who would be better for him than me. But I think I really like him. Maybe I even…

I felt my cheeks warm up and I started fidgeting . This wasn't meant to happen; I wasn't meant to fall for anyone! I was supposed to leave this place!

'So do you know what you're going to have?'

I jumped at his voice and tried to calm myself, 'erm, I… don't know what anything is.'

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips and his attempts to fight it failed. He cleared his throat, 'well, how about I get you what I'm having?'

'And what are you having?'

'It's this fish thing. It's good, I've had it before'.

I narrowed my eyes, 'you eat corn fungus, I don't trust you'.

'It's nice! I promise!'.

'Fine, I'll have the fish thing', we both set the menus down and settled into an awkward silence. I'm guessing he hadn't dated a lot of girls either judging by the lack of conversation.

'So…', I broke the silence. I had the sudden urge to laugh and apparently, so did he.

'This is stupid. _We_ are stupid', he laughed.

It was the most beautiful thing ever; his smile was enough to make anyone fall for him. My favourite thing when he laughs is the glint in his eyes and when they dance. They captivate me and I can't stop staring which ends up embarrassing for me but inflates his already large ego.

The rest of the evening went quite well. The food was actually quite nice; I'm beginning to trust him a little more with food which is one of the most important things in a relationship in my opinion. Forget trust, if he can't choose what to eat he needs to be dumped in a heartbeat.

The conversation aspect was also pleasant. There wasn't another awkward moment and I had more fun than I had in a long time.

He dropped me off at my apartment and the dilemma of the goodnight kiss arose. He started twiddling his fingers so I decided to put him out of his misery and gave him a chaste peck on the cheek.

'That's all you're getting today mister,' I smiled at him.

'Well then, I can't wait til tomorrow', he grinned impishly at me. 'Anything planned?'

'I might go over to Kat's just to see how she's doing. Wanna tag along?', I asked.

'Of course. If it means seeing you again', he was practically beaming, which to be honest, scared the hell out of me.

'Uh… are you okay?', I asked apprehensively.

He nodded enthusiastically, 'I'm great!'

'Okay… so I'm going to go now. I'll see you tomorrow', I said whilst making sure he really was okay.

He waved goodbye and left leaving me in an apartment which seemed too quiet. I had fun tonight which was nice. Maybe the relationship thing isn't too bad after all, I mean, I could give it a try.

My mind wandered back to the meal. We had so many things in common and so many things that were different which was perfect. He was really smart so it wasn't like talking to a brick wall; he actually had his own opinions on important matters and thought logically about things instead of jumping to conclusions. As well as all that, he is one of the best looking guys I have ever seen.

I realised I was kneeling in front of the door smiling to myself like an idiot which made me smile even more. What was this guy doing to me?

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**Trying to get things moving a little faster :). I have an ending in mind which... I will not give away at this moment but I'm getting all excited now :P Teehee!**

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	15. Chapter 15

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**Chapter 15 **

I ran full speed towards the school, holding a half-eaten apple in my hand praying that the bell hadn't rung yet. It was my first day back after a long time and I didn't really fancy being late.

I spend Saturday at Katrina's house while her father was out of town which ended up be a peaceful unwinding day. Her house was average sized; nothing like Kai's 'palace'. There were three bedrooms, one for her father, one for her and a guest room which was hardly ever used. We spent the first couple of hours doing chores which wasn't ideal but she had to finish them before her father got back. For some reason, she reminds me of a princess from a fairy-tale or something; like Cinderella who had to clean and cook all day for her stepmother, or in her case, her biological father. I used to think it was normal for parents to hate their children until I went to primary school (A/N I think Americans call it elementary school) and saw that all the kids loved their parents vice versa. Now I just think it's sad if a parent doesn't love their child.

The rest of the day was good though. We just watched a couple of chick flicks and Kat showed me a tattoo she got on her ankle. It was a vine with flowers growing from it all the way round and it looked really cute. She bombarded me with questions about my date with Kai and what was going to happen next which I didn't really know how to answer. She also asked about Ash which made me smirk a little; it was obvious the girl had a crush on him. Too bad he was a playboy with nothing else to do and the fact that he lived in England made it all a little worse.

…

Three minutes late. The class was just settling down as I rushed into the classroom and put my brakes on. I froze in the middle and turned to see approximately 30 heads staring right at me. The teacher stood in front of the board with a raised eyebrow while I rushed to my seat and proceeded to bash my head against the desk multiple times.

'Well, now that we are all here, why don't we begin?' Miss Toda beamed, 'oh and it's nice to have you back Felicity'. I frowned at her turned my head to look out of the window.

A paper airplane flew on to my desk. I glanced around the room, searching for the culprit when I saw Kai mouth, 'Tala'. I looked at him with a puzzled expression on my face and he merely shrugged.

Quietly, I opened the airplane; _where have you been sunshine? The last time I saw you was around 3 months ago and you weren't exactly yourself. Is something wrong?_

I glared at the piece of paper, he wasn't concerned. I could practically hear the amusement in his words. I scrunched it up into a ball and shoved it into my bag, ignoring the glances I kept getting from him. A couple of minutes later, another one landed in front of me, which I threw into my bag without opening; it wasn't worth the effort.

The rest of the lesson was spent doodling on my book, listening to the stupid bimbo Hilary go on and on about what she did on the weekend which wasn't even relevant to psychology. Sometimes I think the teachers are just as stupid as some of the kids.

The bell rang everyone began to shuffle around, impatiently waiting for Miss Toda to finish handing out the homework assignment. I glanced over to Kai and found myself blushing; his hands were behind his head and he yawned widely as he stretched his long legs in front of him. He reminded me of a lovable large cat which you can't help but stroke. I chuckled under my breath and went back to staring at the teacher who had just finished her speech.

'Felicity, may I have a quick word please?' Miss Toda called out to me as the children were filing out of the classroom. I noticed Kai waiting by the door and I motioned for him to wait outside.

'I heard about your problem and I just want to let you know that if you can't do any of the work or if you feel too stressed then please, tell me and don't do it. This is something that you obviously must get used to and live with' she smiled at me sweetly.

'Thank you' I replied spiritlessly. I didn't really want her to tell me about how I needed to live my life; I know her intentions were good but for some reason, her words irked me.

I left the classroom and saw Kai leaning against the wall, 'what did she what?'

'Just telling me to take it easy; it's not like I didn't know that already' I grumbled under my breath.

He sighed and shook his head before an adorable smile showed up on his face. My heart fluttered in my chest and I held on to the wall to steady myself. 'What?' I stuttered.

'Nothing. It's nothing' he answered simply. 'Let's go'. He grabbed my hand and began walking towards our next class. I glanced down at our intertwined fingers and felt myself blush deeply. He just kept walking like there was nothing going on and I envied his ability to put on a disinterested mask in these situations.

I spent the whole walk thinking about his hands and didn't realise that the lesson I had next was chemistry… with a certain teacher. I froze metres away from the classroom, dragging Kai back with me.

'What's wrong?' he leaned in close but I was too anxious to notice. I forgot that I had slept with Mr Whitlock only 3 months ago. Granted, my state of mind wasn't at its best but I still remembered what happened. I considered telling someone so I could change teachers or just skip his classes all together. Instead, I just stood there welded to the ground.

Kai grabbed on to my shoulders and shook me roughly, trying to get a response before I finally looked up at him and smiled sadly. 'I don't feel too good. I think I'm going to go to the nurse's office to lay down.'

'I'll take you. Or should I take you home instead?' the words rushed out of his mouth worriedly.

I shook my head, 'It's fine. I'll see you later.' I smiled at him again and made my way towards to the nurse, trying to forget about the animalistic act I had committed with the young teacher.

…

A couple of hours later, I woke up to find my left hand tangled in delicate blue locks which I swore weren't there when I feel asleep. I sat up slowly, being careful not to wake the still boy from his tranquil sleep. My hand returned to his hair and my fingers began to run through it without my consent. I started to panic due to the fact that my limbs were now moving of their own accord but calmed down after watching him take steady rhythmic breaths which I began to follow. I ran my fingers along the back of his head which seemed to be sensitive as he let out a quiet groan. I stared at his relaxed features and reached out to touch his soft looking lips when a large hand latched on to mine, specifically, the one in his hair. I squeaked and almost fell off the bed before holding on to the side for dear life.

'You could have given me a frigging heart attack!' I said, trying to relax myself.

He looked at me, his eyes half lidded and languid. His large masculine hand began tracing random patterns on my wrist which caused my skin to burn with excitement. I swallowed with great difficulty and kept my eyes locked with his crimson orbs. Finally, he smirked at me and surrendered my hand before standing up so his lips were level with my neck. My eyes widened as I felt his tongue run along the side of my neck to the back of my ear and I gasped when I felt him suck roughly on my earlobe. I felt him smirk at my response, 'this is your fault. You shouldn't play with my hair. It does strange things to me'

'I… didn't…' I was silenced by a warm finger which rested on my lips. My eyes followed his trail as he moved down to my chin and nudged my head upwards to look at him.

'You look adorable cross eyed' he chuckled and I slowly moved my gaze upwards to meet his. He was really close, I could practically feel his smirk and taste the peppermint in my mouth; to be honest, nothing had tasted nicer.

I inched towards him, impatient to feel him and apparently he felt the same as he lunged forward and latched on to my lower lip, sucking on it sensually. His hands gripped my waist tightly and pulled me forward so my legs were dangling off the edge of the bed. He settled between them and leaned into me so the length of our bodies were pressed against each other. He never left my mouth; I had no idea how we were going for this long without coming up for air.

I wrapped my legs around his lean waist instinctively while his hands caressed my sides. My fingers automatically moved to his hair where they started playing with his vibrant blue locks. He groaned loudly against my mouth, 'Fuck. This is what got you into trouble in the first place'.

I laughed quietly, thanking the heavens I was in this situation. His lips captured mine again in another heated kiss; he ran his tongue along my bottom lip asking for permission. I opened my mouth slightly and was surprised when his tongue entered with more force than I had expected and I tightened my legs around waist.

He froze suddenly and stepped back, letting my legs dangle off the bed once again. I glanced up at his face and noticed his troubled expression. Doubts began to rise in my mind – what if I wasn't good enough? Or what if he didn't like me anymore. Maybe… maybe he got bored of me already and found someone else.

I felt his fingers lightly touch my jawline, 'I'm sorry, I-'

'It's fine' I turned my head away and tried to regulate my breathing, feeling a little stupid and immature to think I was good enough.

His hands cupped my face as he forced me to look at him. His eyes looked serious, 'I don't want to rush things. We're in the nurse's office and you do have… you have a certain effect on me which would be difficult to get rid of here'.

Wait, what? I blinked a couple of times and tried to process his words. Effect? I looked down and saw a noticeable bulge in his pants and I blushed a deep red.

He chuckled, 'exactly'.

I let out a relieved laugh. I was always thinking of the worst possible outcome. His arm snaked around my waist and pulled me down.

'Come on. Lunch waits for no man' he winked.

I smirked, 'or woman'.

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**Soooooooo... what do you think? REVIEW! x**


	16. Chapter 16

**PLEASE DON'T EAT ME! I'm sorry for not updating this weekend. It took me a while to finish this chapter. And thank you to everyone who reviewed :) LOVE YOU GUYS!**

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**Chapter 16**

'Miss Phoenix! Please wait for a moment' a voice called behind me. I turned around to see none other than Mr Whitlock, looking a little flustered and anxious. He smiled weakly and motioned for me to join him in the chemistry classroom in which we had our little… _escapade._

I sat on the seat opposite him and waited patiently as he cleared his throat and picked at his skin nervously. 'Well, erm… I…' He shut his mouth again, staring at his shoes. I kept silent, interested in what he may say and also curious as to how long he would remain in his agitated state. The clock above his head ticked loudly and the sound echoed through the room. Every so often, a group of students would walk past chattering away as if everything was fine with the world.

'About what… what happened' the tremor in his voice was apparent. 'It was a mistake and I am sure you realise that as well. We are human after all and we do make mistakes, even adults like me.' He laughed apprehensively. 'I was made aware recently of your erm… _condition._ I realise now that you didn't realise what you were doing and I am sure that we can put all of this behind us. It's all in the past, just water under the bridge'.

I merely stared at the young teacher, my piercing gaze was obviously making him uncomfortable as he was squirming in his seat. My outward appearance may have been calm but inside I was fuming. _I _didn't know what I was doing? What about him? He was just at fault as I was! Scratch that, I wasn't at fault in the slightest due to the fact that_ I was bloodly manic!_

His eyes locked with mine, waiting for any sign that I was listening to him and not just staring through him. Without uttering a word, I stood up and sauntered out of the classroom.

…

My head was hanging of the edge of the bed while Kat sat on her chair, watching me curiously.

'Isn't the blood rushing to your head?' She inquired. I sighed in response and slid myself up to sit cross legged on the bed. My mind was too occupied with other issues and I suddenly remembered Conrad telling me to shout my problems out to the world because there was probably someone else who had it worse than me. I guess there was nothing wrong with testing out that theory now, I mean, there's nothing like the present.

'I had sex with Mr Whitlock.' Bombshell dropped.

The whole room went still. Her yellow eyes were wide, brows furrowed and mouth agape. I swallowed with great difficulty; she was, after all, my first female friend and I think girls are meant to bond by telling each other everything, even the embarrassing stuff but judging by the expression on her face, that wasn't such a good idea.

'He molested me' her voice was almost silent.

I remembered the bimbo Hilary telling me something about Kat punching Mr Whitlock in the face because he had molested her but they had all disregarded it, saying it was her fault. I knew something must have happened; people don't usually react so violently if nothing provoked them.

'Yeah… you got suspended didn't you? I heard you punched him. I wasn't sure whether or not to believe the rumours but I guess they were true.' My eyes were fixed on one place and I avoided looking at her. 'By the way, I didn't do it on purpose-'

She snorted and narrowed her eyes at me 'So you just fucked him by accident then?'

I winced at her crude language. 'I was manic, I didn't know what I was doing'

She went silent again and stared at the floor. 'I'm sorry, I just… I didn't know. I thought-'

'What should I do?' I was surprised to hear myself ask her since I was so used to solving problems without help. I felt strange yet, _nice. _

Kat stared at the ceiling pensively, 'Well it depends. I told the head teacher and instead of Mr Whitlock being fired, I got shunned by the school. I guess all the kids really like him'

I chuckled, 'like I'm not already shunned by the school.'

'You don't have it as bad. Tala still talks to you doesn't he? He flirts with you all the time but he doesn't even glance in my direction, not that I want him to' she growled at the thought of the cocky redhead.

'Look, to be honest, I couldn't give a damn about my so called reputation. And I will be a happy woman the day Tala Valkov stops talking to me' Kai's face suddenly flashed through my mind and I groaned loudly. 'What should I tell Kai? He's going to think I'm a whore!'

Kat rolled her eyes and smirked, 'well, well, well missy. I didn't think you cared what Kai thought of you' she winked and continued, 'If you explain it to him, he can't say anything since you weren't _aware_ of your actions. The only problem is _how_ you're going to tell him. You could take him to a romantic dinner and then BAM! Tell him. Or you could go straight to the bam'.

I fell back on to the bed and started bashing my head against it. Going straight to the 'bam' as Kat puts it might be the better idea; however, sweetening him up before the 'bam' is also a viable option. I groaned at my situation once again. Why was I thinking about this so much? It wasn't as if we were serious… that kiss was pretty serious though. My mind started wondering to the nurse's office and I felt my fingers tingle.

A door suddenly slammed downstairs and I shot up from the bed. Kat looked panic-stricken and started looking around for a place to hide me while I glanced out the window to see if I could jump out and make my great escape. Her window was towards the back of the house and the shed was right underneath it. If I could jump out and land on the shed, it wouldn't be impossible; but there was always the chance that the shed roof would fall through and that does not seem like fun.

I could hear heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and made the split second decision to exit via the window. I opened the window and stood up on the ledge before frog hopping out on to the shed roof and freezing. I was waiting for the roof to collapse and for me to fall through which never happened, thankfully. Kat stuck her head out of the window and whispered, 'I'm so sorry'.

I shook my head and smiled at her before jumping off gracefully, feet firmly planted on the ground. I snuck around the house until I got to the street and began running back home.

…

By the time I got to my apartment, it was fairly dark so the diner was practically empty. My feet began moving towards it without my mind telling them to do so; I guess hunger takes over willpower.

The diner itself was quite large. There were family sized tables dotted around and a bar area near the counter for those who prefer sitting on their own. The food wasn't too bad either; it was tasty yet cheap which is why this was a hotspot for kids at school.

I grabbed a menu and found the largest table to sit at so I could stretch out. I ordered a lot of food – enough to feed 4 people which didn't go unnoticed as the waitress furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. I had to confirm by order twice for her to understand that I generally eat a lot. After she left, I rested my head on the table and began to ponder. After final exams, the summer holidays would start and I was planning on going back to England for all the holidays; but all of that depends on me passing final exams and who knew if that was possible. Summer holidays (or vacation as the Americans call it) last 2 months here but only 6 weeks in the UK. Maybe I should go for 6 weeks and spend the rest of my time here.

I spent a long time deciding on what I would be doing that I didn't notice a familiar group of school kids walk in. Tala Valkov was at the front and as soon as he spotted me, he led the group towards my table and they all began to sit down. During all of this my head was planted to the table and my mind was distant, until I felt someone flick the back of my head. I glanced up to see my favourite people in the whole wide world. Tala, Hilary, Max, Mariah and a ginger haired boy who I didn't recognize sat around me. I groaned loudly, wanting them to hear my displeasure at seeing their faces.

'Ugh, like, don't be so rude. It is not nice', Hilary glared at me while I merely ignored here incessant whining. 'You shouldn't even be at this diner, I mean, it's _our_ diner.'

'Actually, she has as much right to be here as you do', a deep voice spoke out. I glanced at the ginger haired boy and raised an eyebrow. Before I could say anything, the waitress came out with my feast while the group in front stared at me, horrified at the quantity I was about to consume.

'Were you waiting for someone?' Tala asked, his eyes popping out of his sockets.

'Nope,' I replied before digging in. All five of them had their eyes fixed on me, which I brushed off, their faces were priceless. I snuck a look at the ginger haired boy; he had bright blue eyes and a handsome face accompanied by a lean figure and long limbs. His left ear had a simple, silver ring in it which gave him a devil-may-care vibe. His voice was deep and detached; all-in-all, he seemed like a very interesting person, someone who I wouldn't mind getting to know.

'Brookie baby, can you go get me an apple please', Mariah fluttered her long, pink eyelashes as the ginger boy stood up to tend to her wish. He returned with a large portion of deep fried apple and I was forced to shove food in my mouth to stop myself from laughing.

Her face twisted into a look of pure terror, 'OMG! What are you thinking? DON'T bring that near me! I can feel the calories radiating off it. It's disgusting'.

The boy sat down and began to dig into the unhealthy looking apple.

I fixed my gaze on him, '_Brookie, _do you mind if I have a taste of that delicious looking fruit?'

He smirked, 'of course, _dear, _it's really good'

Mariah glared at me and latched on to his arm, signalling that he was taken. I raised an eyebrow at her in amusement and stabbed a piece of the apple with my fork. I lifted it up to my mouth and began inspecting it. I stared at Mariah, keeping eye contact, and began to lick the apple slowly, starting from the bottom. I sucked the top of the apple and pulled it out with a pop. I bit the tip gently and swallowed it while glancing around the table. The boys had their gaze fixed on my mouth while the girls looked horrified.

I snorted and began to laugh uncontrollably. Tala and Max and the two bimbos looked uncomfortable while _Brookie_ just smiled. I wiped away the tears in my eyes and composed myself. I cleared my throat and turned to look at the smiling boy.

'What's your name anyway? I'm guessing it's not _Brookie' _I grinned.

'Brooklyn, Brooklyn Masefield' his smile reached his eyes and he held out his hand which I accepted. 'Tala described you differently'.

'Huh… did he now?' I threw a sickly sweet smile at Tala before standing up. 'It has been an absolute _pleasure_ seeing all of you but I must be going now.'

I walked out of the diner, leaving two angry girls, two shocked boys and a possible friend. Not bad, not bad at all.

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**SOOOO... what do you guys think? Constructive criticism always appreciated :) Gracias (I'm being Spanish today) :P x**


	17. Chapter 17

**Here ya go dudes! Enjoy! Oh and thanks to everyone who reviewed, it makes me so happy! :D**

**I don't own Beyblade :(**

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**Chapter 17**

I shot up in bed – my whole body enveloped in sweat and my heart pumping at an inhumane rate. I stared at a point on the wall opposite until my mind focused and my body calmed down. I glanced at the clock on my bedside table; 4 a.m., fantastic. There was nothing better than being woken up by a nightmare about your own mother. The whole thing just makes me want to pity myself which is depressing in its own way.

I sighed and grabbed my laptop; anything to pass the time. School was starting in about 5 hours and I had that much time to prepare what I was going to tell Kai about Mr Whitlock. Or maybe I should do what Kat said and take him out somewhere first. I groaned and bashed my head against the wall. Why was life so hard?

…

Two films later and it was time to get ready for school. I judged myself in the mirror; maybe I should make an effort today instead of looking like a corpse. I grabbed the foundation and gently patted some under my eyes to mask the dark circles. I then added some colour to my cheeks and finished with light pink lip gloss. I cringed at my reflection; it had been such a long time since I'd worn make-up to school and my face just felt heavy. I yanked a brush through my hair which I decided to leave as it was, since it never did anything I wanted it to do. I glanced down at my outfit; an oversized burgundy hoody, shorts and converse.

Grabbing my bag and keys, I left my apartment. The corridor was empty and eerily quiet. My floor had five rooms; I occupied one, obviously. There were two families in two of the rooms and I had no idea who was in the remaining ones. I wasn't very sociable when it came to neighbours and no-one ever made the effort to get to know me but I like the way our floor operates. The one above us has parties every week which a certain room has to host. They have themes and everything which seems like a hassle to me and I am glad that we aren't like that. Call me a recluse, but who wants strangers in their apartment making awkward small talk, pretending to like the food you made when there are so many other important things you could do; like homework or laundry.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I noticed a certain someone waiting outside for me.

'Hey, nice to see you again', that certain someone said.

I glared at him, 'How the hell did you know where I live?'

He made a mock hurt face and put a hand on his chest, 'You don't know? I've been your stalker for a long time now. I'm offended, I gave you so much of my time and you don't even know who I am.'

I rolled my eyes and tried to supress my smile, but failed. 'Alright Brooklyn, seriously, what are you doing here?'

His clear blue eyes shone brightly, 'I'm here to walk you to school silly.'

I looked at him vacantly, '… why?'

'I don't need a reason', he began walking away but stopped when he noticed I wasn't following him.

I sighed loudly and trailed after him. We walked in silence for a couple of minutes before Brooklyn spoke, 'so… why do you hang out with those losers anyway? You seem cooler than that'.

I growled, 'they aren't losers. In my opinion, your friends are the wankers,' I stopped walking, 'you know what, you can go to school on your own. I wouldn't want to ruin your reputation since I'm a loser'

To my utmost surprise, he threw his head back and laughed. I froze on the spot and tried to figure out what was so funny. I found nothing.

'_You_ are not a loser, far from it actually. And you think I _care _about reputations and all that bullshit? People can think what they want. I only hang out with them because I've been friends with Tala since we were young and he isn't a bad person,' he tilted his head to glance at me. 'He has a thing for you.'

I started gaping like a fish, trying to form a coherent sentence. 'But… he… evil…. and…._why_?'

Brooklyn started walking again, 'He has a sort of power issue. He spent a long time trying to… _control_ the school and according to him, you would make a great partner.'

I snorted and rolled my eyes, 'so what? He wants me to _rule_ with him?'

'Yes', he replied all too seriously.

'You're kidding. This is all some joke that you're going to tell your friends later and they'll all laugh like, _oh my God, I can't believe she thought Tala would like her, what a loser_.'

He ignored my comment, 'but of course, that girl, Kat, came along and you got all chummy with her which irked the rest of the guys. What really gets Tala's blood boiling is the fact that Kai has a thing for you and you have a thing for him'.

'Would you stop saying _thing, _it sounds weird', I replied lamely.

He smirked at me, 'you didn't deny it'.

I blinked a couple of times and processed his words, trying to weigh out my options. Denying it now would be pointless, so option number two it was. 'No, I didn't deny it'.

'So you love him then, interesting.'

My eyes widened with shock, 'hold up there. Who said anything about _love_? I don't _love_ him!'

His calculating gaze met mine and I could feel him trying to figure me out. 'I guess you have issues with love since you practically spat the word out'.

'I didn't-'

'Doesn't matter. We're here anyway.'

I looked up to see the school entrance right in front of me. I swear we left the apartment literally two minutes ago.

'I guess time flies when you're under a bloody microscope' I muttered under my breath.

He must have heard as he laughed again, 'it was nice talking to you again,' he glanced inside. 'Your boyfriend is waiting for you. And it looks like he's a little mad.'

I frowned, 'He's not my boyfriend'.

'Yet', there was a glint in his eyes as he walked away and left me standing in front of the doors nervously.

They swung open and I saw Kai leaning against the wall. He was wearing a simple white t-shirt which fitted him tightly; I could see the muscular lines of his chest and I had to supress the urge to reach out and trace them. I remembered our session in the nurse's office and shivered lightly.

'Hey, what's up?' I could feel the tension in the air.

'Why were you walking with _him_?' his face revealed no emotions, but his eyes showed a storm brewing.

'He just wanted to chat, and why do you care anyway? It's not like you're my boyfriend.' I realised that was the wrong thing to say at a time like this.

He flinched and glared at me, anger present in his crimson eyes, 'Do you want a written contract or something? Should we both sign our names at the bottom, then make copies and post them all over school?'

I looked at him with a bewildered expression, 'What are you talking about?'

'You – are – my – _girlfriend._'

I didn't have a chance to reply as I felt his lips crash on to mine angrily and I felt his arm encircle my waist as he pulled me closer. I placed my hands on his chest and was about to run them down before he let go of me suddenly. The bruising kiss finished as soon as it started and I was left staring at him, completely perplexed. My mouth was open slightly and my eyes searched his for any explanation.

He sighed and ran his fingers through his silky blue hair. 'I apologize if I didn't make it clear before.'

I was still staring at him, utterly confused, 'I'm your girlfriend?'

He raised an eyebrow, 'yes'.

'Oh'

There was a long pause.

'Oh? Is that it? _Oh?_' his eyebrows were furrowed. He shook his head in disbelief and started to walk away before I grabbed his wrist to stop him.

'I didn't mean it like that. It just… took me by surprise. I didn't know that you wanted to be… you know, boyfriend –girlfriend. Just needed to register it', I looked up at him, trying to make my eyes as wide and innocent as possible so he would forgive me quickly. It always worked with Ash, no reason it would fail me now.

'Has it registered?' he replied calmly.

'Yeah, I think so'

He nodded his head and grabbed my hand before walking towards our first lesson. As soon as we were walking side by side he let go of my hand and placed it around me waist possessively, pulling me close towards him. I blushed and turned my head away so he wouldn't see, before I remembered something.

'By the way, just because you're my…' I paused, too embarrassed to say the word.

'-_boyfriend_' he filled in.

'Yeah, _that._ It doesn't mean I can't hang out with my guy friends.'

He snorted, 'That ginger idiot is your friend? Since when?'

'He's not an idiot. He's an alright person. And since a few days ago'.

Kai rolled his eyes and smirked, 'fine, fine. Guy friends are allowed.'

'And I don't need your permission to do things. I am an independent person and would like to stay that way'.

He frowned, 'depends on the thing. As long as it doesn't overstep the boundary' he paused for a minute and started smiling.

'What?'

'You really do need a written contract, don't you?' he smirked, a glint in his eyes.

I blushed before spluttering, 'No! I know how to do this!' Truth be told, I hadn't been in a relationship in a long time and for some reason, Kai made me lose myself. He turned me into an idiot who couldn't speak properly and whose face turned pink at his voice. It was humiliating.

He chuckled and pulled me closer towards him, if that was possible, I was already practically glued to his hip.

'Well, well, well. Flaunting our relationship this early in the morning are we?'

I swivelled round to see Kat smirking at us, her mask firmly in place. She walked with confidence and a certain level of swagger which made everyone else think she was immune to the hatred directed towards her. It was only when we were alone her mask would slide off and she would become the timid and frightened girl.

Kai snorted and went back to being silent. Kat raised an eyebrow at him before turning to look at me.

'What's up with him?' she asked.

'No idea' I lied.

'Reeaaally' he added, stretching the word out, obviously trying to embarrass me. Kat looked bemused and began pestering me to tell her what was going on.

She suddenly went silent. I looked up to see Tala, Hilary and Brooklyn standing directly in front of us. Tala's sharp blue eyes were fixed on Kai's hand on my waist. I glanced at Brooklyn who also noticed the redhead's irritated demeanour and mouthed silently, _I told you so_.

I gulped and spoke up, 'uh excuse me, could we pass through please?' Tala's eyes snapped up to mine and I flinched at the bitterness present in his blue orbs. I could feel the anger radiating off him in waves and I really didn't want to be on the receiving end of that.

I felt Kai's hand tighten on my waist and he was about to step forward before Tala walked past us silently, his shoulder knocking against Kai's roughly. Hilary, too slow to realise what happened, just ran past and tried to catch up to the infuriated redhead.

Brooklyn gave a low whistle, 'Man, he is gonna be in a bad mood all day now.' He shook his head and smiled at me before following the other two teens.

There was a strange silence amongst the three of us before Kat spoke, 'What the _hell_ was that?'

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**So... what do you think? REVIEW! TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE HAPPEN!**


	18. Chapter 18

Hey guys...

This isn't a chapter and I have some news, just don't hunt me down and eat me. I'm not happy with this story and haven't been for a while. Personally, I think it's too deep for my first one and I should have started with something shorter and lighthearted. To Captain Munchkin - I read your review and it made me chuckle a little - not because it was bad or anything but because it was exactly what I've been thinking. The storyline is a little random and I think I added a bit too much. I had a plan at the start (kind of) but as I went along, the story got more and more complicated because I felt like adding more things.

I want to write more stories and improve my planning skills :P Then, when I am ready, I shall redo this one and make it better :D I'M SO SORRY TO THE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY LIKED IT! Sorry to the reviewers and followers and favouriters. *Sniff sniff. So sad :( But I will deffo redo it in the future. AND IT WILL KICK ASS! (hopefully) :)

Fifitheflowertot x


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